Monthly Archives: April 2012

Wishcasting Wednesday

13 Replies

image from Jamie's post

What do you wish to experience?

Contentment. Satisfaction and peace, surrender and acceptance, ease and relaxation, fearlessness and joy, simplicity and engagement.

Love. On every channel, all the time, 24/7. Know it, feel it, be it. Love, love, love. And then, more love. Keep it coming, keep it going.

Health. Full body and full life wholehearted and embodied wellness. I want to light up, shine with it, glow, radiate.

Confidence. Certainty, courage, daring, determination, faith, tenacity.

Self-love. This is most likely a combination or culmination of the rest, what is at the center, the heart of everything else, its foundation, but it seems to be worth an independent mention. I want to move through the hours and days of my life with supreme confidence in my innate wisdom, compassion, strength, and fundamental goodness.

That part of the list is states of being, but there are also “things” I wish to experience.

Playing the ukulele well enough that I wouldn’t embarrass myself. The secret wish underneath is to someday be able to do a duet with Danielle Ate the Sandwich. Just once, please. But I have a lot of work to do first, like learning to play.

Publication. I’m okay without it. I have a full writing life, even if it never happens. Writing is like prayer for me, a spiritual practice, and I am utterly devoted to it. But…I’d also like to be published, as in paid for my work, as in people curled up in hammocks or in front of a fire on the couch cuddling with their dog reading my books.

Paid work that isn’t work, but rather pure love, aligned with my calling, maybe even God’s work. I’ve said it before and it bears repeating that I don’t need what I love to pay my rent, or turn into a business, and yet…it might not be the worst thing if what I love, the work I would do regardless, the thing that wakes me up in the middle of the night thinking and planning, the stuff that makes me wake up and rise at 4:30 am every morning, and the money, the means to take care of what needs taken care of, would be in the same location at the same time, would feed each other, work together, and then I could just do what I love, all the time, instead of trying to juggle full-time paid work with everything else I want to do. It is sometimes like trying to live two lives, and that can be exhausting, and lonely.

Hike the Appalachian Trail with Eric.

My very own writing cabin.

A whole summer in Amsterdam.

Dathun, a month long meditation retreat at Shambhala Mountain Center.

An in-person workshop with Brene’ Brown.

P.S. The magic power of wishing, part two: Holy wow! Brene’ is going to be in Boulder for a two day workshop in May, and I am going.

A yoga retreat with my friend and yoga teacher Jessica.

A writing workshop with Natalie Goldberg.

Church with Anne Lamott.

A meet-up with Susannah Conway. Really, what I would love is a long weekend on the beach with her, writing and blogging and taking pictures and talking and taking long naps and eating and laughing.

P.S. The magic power of wishing: I just found out this morning, less than 24 hours after making this post, that Susannah is going to be at the World Domination Summit, and has proposed a writing workshop. Even if the workshop doesn’t go (it so will), there is a very real chance that I am going to be able to at least tell her in person how much I adore her. I can hardly believe it, but it’s true!

Walk and talk with Mary Oliver. This is most likely the craziest wish on this list, but I would just love to be near her and able to tell her just once in-person how much I love her, how much her words have meant to me.

Swim without fear.

Hike with Judy Clement Wall.
A walk on the beach with Julia.
Take pictures or paint with Andrea Scher.
Sit with Jen Lemen at her kitchen table.
Sit in stillness with Erica Staab.
Meditate with Susan Piver, (oh wait, I actually get to do this in a few weeks!).
Discuss writing with Margaret Atwood, and not embarrass myself.
Trust over a cup of tea with Kristin Noelle.
Make art with Patti Digh.
Take a yoga class with Jennifer Louden.
Ask Pema Chödrön one million questions.
Take a Nia class with Jamie Ridler.
Go on tour with Aimee Mann.
Teach an art and writing class for girls with Kandyce.
Draw with Hugh MacLeod.
Listen to Neil Gaiman read.

I could keep going with this list forever and ever…so many good people doing so much good stuff and I want to just hang out with them and soak up all that goodness and tell them to their sweet faces how much I adore them.

Three Truths and One Wish

2 Replies

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the nature of truth, about my truth and about reality, the nature of things. As someone who studies Buddhist philosophy and practices meditation and mindfulness, I think about it a lot. I ask myself “is this true?” or “is this solid?” In my Fearlessness in Everyday Life class, we were asked a few weeks ago to contemplate if there was anything solid, anything that didn’t change. This made me think even more intently and directly about what might be real, genuine, certain, unchangeable, dependable, absolute.

There are only two things I could think of: basic goodness (inherent wisdom and compassion, the fundamental nature of sentient beings, I might also call this love), also referred to as buddha nature (the seed of mindfulness and enlightenment in every person, representing our potential to become fully awake), and change or impermanence.

And it doesn’t end there, this contemplation of truth. A loving, confident, strong, whip smart woman suggested that I challenge the stories I tell myself, the myths and even the lies, about me and my life. Thoughts and emotions arise, judgements and beliefs, and I ask myself “is this true?”

I made a list with my friend Joyce on Facebook about the nature of truth:

Knowing what is true for yourself: confidence.
Believing that it must also be true for everyone else: ego.
Trying to force others to accept our truth: aggression.
Being able to let go of old truths that no longer serve us: freedom
Accepting that others may not understand or agree with our truth: serenity.
Standing by our truth in the face of adversity: strength.

Truth sometimes seems clear, tangible, solid, and and other times it is complicated, utterly confusing, like a dream we only half remember, and certainly can’t understand. And yet, I am going to try to say three things that are true about truth, (it’s like a riddle, isn’t it?).

1. Truth: Most of what we think of as truth is relative and subjective. Other than a few essentials, most of the time what might be true in one moment is only that, temporary, and only true because of how you relate to it, viewed as it is through your current perception. Even with all the good, dependable information out there–websites, blogs, newsletters, classes, workshops, experts, teachers, plans, techniques, strategies, practices, methods, and programs, most of it easily accessible and some of it even free–it’s all ultimately relative and subjective. Because of this, we have to develop discernment, critical thinking. And we must reject fundamentalism. Truth is fluid, and having fixed ideas in a world where change and impermanence are the fundamental reality is a risky strategy.

Most of what we think of as truth is relative and subjective? This is good news. It means it’s okay to let go, relax.

2. Truth: Since truth is never an absolute, we must learn to trust ourselves, and allow our truths to be organic. We must have faith in our intuition, our own naturally arising wisdom. This can be difficult if you were taught to not trust your own instincts, or if you’ve been denying them for a really long time. But, we must be willing to let go of beliefs that no longer serve us, not get attached, and also not reject new ideas or possibilities. We are always changing, and what’s true for us will change too. Remain open. Only don’t know.

Since truth is never an absolute, we must learn to trust ourselves, and allow our truths to be organic. This is good news. It means it’s okay to let go, relax.

3. Truth: You must take responsibility for your own truth. Only you can know it. Trying to adopt someone else’s truth is a cheat that won’t work. Looking to others for a fix, an answer, permission, a program or strategy to apply to your life can be helpful, but in the end, it is up to you. Your true north isn’t “out there,” and finding it will be more like remembering. Rest when you need to, contemplate when you must, trust your intelligence, your understanding, your instincts, and the closer you get, the clearer your view will be. It might make you laugh with surprise, but there will also be a deep knowing, recognition. Attention is essential, mindfulness is key to the discovery, as are relaxation and gentleness.

You must take responsibility for your own truth? Yes, dear reader, even this is good news. It too means it’s okay to let go, relax.

One wish: That you know the supreme confidence of your particular truth, and that you can let go of what no longer serves you. I wish always, no matter what three truths I might share, that you know your innate goodness, wisdom and compassion, that you remember, awaken to the light of your true nature.

It’s okay. Cheer up. You’re perfect.