Something Good

I’ve been reminded lately how much I’ve always loved these little weirdos. (Photo by David Clode on Unsplash)

1. memories of australia (and how you can help) from Karen Walrond on Chookooloonks.

2. The High Cost of Fatphobia on Dances with Fat. In related news, this wisdom from Melissa Toler‘s latest newsletter, in which she talks about a recent interview in which “Jillian Michaels made some pretty awful comments about Lizzo,” and says,

Here’s the thing: Jillian Michaels is a fitness professional who has a long history of publicly shaming and abusing fat people in the name of health, and unfortunately, she’s not alone. What happened during that interview happens everyday in doctors’ offices, health clinics, and fitness centers, where health and wellness professionals condescendingly warn patients that they’ll get diabetes, heart disease, or even die if they don’t lose weight. When events like this occur in the media, I think it’s important for us focus LESS on the celebrities involved and pay attention to the messages and behaviors being displayed:

Despite the popularity of body positivity and the increased awareness around fat activism, there will always be people who are committed to upholding the status quo. This is especially true for folks whose identity and/or income requires them to do so.
Folks like JM who claim to be concerned about the health of others are only concerned when it comes to larger body sizes. They usually don’t have much to say about the toll that constant weight loss attempts take on your mental, physical, and emotional health.
These beliefs are dangerous and harmful. They’re often used to justify discrimination against fat people in healthcare, the workplace, and many other areas of society.

So, even though this was an interview with a famous personal trainer who said some things about a famous musician, it really isn’t about them. It’s an example of the harm caused by people who claim to care about health. But I believe it’s also an opportunity for us to challenge our own thinking about bodies, size, and health.

3. You Absolutely Can Tackle the Big Things You’ve Been Avoiding on Zen Habits. Also from Zen Habits, A Guide to Dealing with Uncertainty About What Path to Take.

4. How starting a writing practice can sharpen your mind, which features some thoughts on the matter from Jena Schwartz.

5. Hide and Seek from Austin Kleon.

6. Good stuff from Patti Digh: an online course Hard Conversations: Whiteness, Race, and Social Justice, and another online course Hard Conversations: Introduction to Racism, and The Art of Activism: Hard Conversations Book Club 2020.

7. Why Finland And Denmark Are Happier Than The U.S.. (video) “What does it take to be happy? The Nordic countries seem to have it all figured out. Finland and Denmark have consistently topped the United Nations’ most prestigious index, The World Happiness Report, in all six areas of life satisfaction: income, healthy life expectancy, social support, freedom, trust and generosity.”

8. 100 Ways to Take a Break.

9. Love Is the Answer to the Climate Crisis on Lion’s Roar. “As the climate crisis worsens, and the window to solve it is quickly closing, we have a choice to make: we can shut down in fear or lean in and open our hearts even more.”

10. Buddhist Books by and for People of Color on Lion’s Roar. “In response to a query from a reader, our editors suggest some books by and for people of color.”

11. $11 Billion And Counting: Trump’s Border Wall Would Be The World’s Most Costly.

12. A Poem for the Veterinary Community from Andrea Gibson. (video)

13. Japanese Artist Transforms Ordinary Rocks Into Highly Realistic Animals.

14. The body-positive movement excludes women like me — those who aren’t ‘acceptably fat.’

15. This Colorado poet found inspiration in everything around her — even cactus spines — to assemble “Naked for Tea.” “Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer explores vulnerability and ‘the invitation to say yes to the world as it is’ in her latest collection.”

16. As Menopause Nears, Be Aware It Can Trigger Depression And Anxiety, Too.

17. The Black Moms Who Occupied a Vacant House and Became Icons of the Homelessness Crisis.

18. How ‘Namaste’ Flew Away From Us.

19. Pema Chödrön steps down from Shambhala position, (sort of).

20. A Derry Girls movie is in talks according to the show’s creator. In other happy TV news, Insecure Returns for Its Fourth Season This Spring, and ‘Wild Seed’: Viola Davis Developing Adaptation Of Octavia Butler Novel At Amazon, Scripted By Nnedi Okorafor And Wanuri Kahiu.

21. 5 Pilates YouTube Videos For Beginners That Are Also Body Positive.

22. New online tool points consumers Native American-owned businesses.

23. The Science Behind Why Diets Don’t Work.

24. 17 Nonfiction Books Feminists Should Read in 2020.

25. Japan Releases a Range of Miniature Furniture for Cats.

26. A VW Beetle Spotted in the Insect Collection at the Cleveland Museum of Natural History.

27. Media Bias Chart. “The AllSides Media Bias Chart offers an easy way to identify political bias in the news so you can be better equipped to navigate our polarized media landscape.”

28. The NFL Takes On Police Shootings of Black Men in New Ad. “The spot, which is slated for the Super Bowl, comes as the league boosts its social justice messaging in wake of the Colin Kaepernick controversy.” This is total bullshit, and I’ve been pretty clear that I think the NFL is a horrible organization. As this article states, “Critics have questioned the league’s motives, seeing the efforts as a way to repair the NFL’s image in the wake of the PR damage done by the Kaepernick controversy. The former San Francisco 49ers quarterback has not been picked up by a team since 2016, the year he started kneeling during the anthem to bring attention to racial inequities.” This follows some pretty similar situations: current day Christians would have judged and hated Jesus when he was alive (and I don’t think he would have been too happy with them either), white people only supported MLK’s message after he was murdered and they could manipulate it to their advantage, all kinds of diet culture behemoths have adopted the body positivity and “wellness/lifestyle” languaging in an attempt to monopolize on trends, etc.

29. “Flood the zone with shit”: How misinformation overwhelmed our democracy. “The impeachment trial probably won’t change any minds. Here’s why.”

30. Today is MLK Day, and these are some things worth reading: 10 Things You May Not Know About Martin Luther King Jr., and Don’t Post An MLK Quote On Social Media Unless You’re Truly Anti-Racist, and The history behind MLK Day, and how you can celebrate it, and The Agitated M.L.K. I Came to Love on The New York Times, and Martin Luther King Jr. Was More Radical Than We Remember, which is two years old now but still worth reading.

31. ‘Spoons are so brutal!’ Paris Hilton’s cooking show is a rare work of comic genius. “In Cooking with Paris, the heiress and her dog dressed as a French maid struggle to make a lasagne. It’s either a baffling vanity project – or an instant classic.”

Gratitude Friday

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Image by Eric

1. The Colorado sky. Today, sadly, it’s mostly gray. We are due a big windstorm later in the day, so hopefully that will clear out the crud.

2. Doing fun stuff with people I love. Lunch and a movie with Chelsey and Jon, dinner and a movie with Chloe’ and Claudia, breakfast with Carrie, a yoga class with Abrona, aqua aerobics and a chat with Janice, sitting in the sauna with Eric, watching “Father Brown” with Eric, laughing with Eric, walking and napping with the dogs, yoga with my Red Sage class, a fitness class with Paige and Beth, random texting with my brother.

3. Practice and therapy and moving my body and napping and eating what I want and napping and reading in bed at night while Eric and the dogs sleep. These are some of the things keeping me from giving up this week. I just reread this and realized I said “napping” twice, but since that is pretty accurate, I’m going to leave it like that.

4. Kindness and support from other people, even if we’ve never met IRL. I posted something on Instagram about having an autoimmune disorder and burnout and was immediately offered so much goodness by people, some of them who I’ve never even met in real life. It can sometimes seem like social media and the internet are a container for the worst of humanity, but it also holds the best of what we are.

5. My tiny family. The real reason we got a whole new sectional is so Eric can stretch his legs out all the way when he takes a nap, and he took full advantage of it before he had to go back to work this week. Sam is still doing better after tweaking his back, but we did have to put him back on a small dose of pain meds to give him a bit more time to heal. I’m so grateful for all the support for him we have access to living here in Fort Collins. This week six years ago we brought Ringo the dingo home. He was so cute and tiny and gray, but clearly part wolverine.

Bonus joy: Clementines, good books (I just finished Where the Crawdads Sing and started The Ghost Bride), good TV (a new season of Catfish), good music, good podcasts, getting the laundry done and put away a day early, the few days I had this week without any anxiety, a long nap when you are really tired, toast with marionberry jam, sleeping in, writing in the morning while drinking a cocoa coffee, blue sky, the softest pajamas, laughing with Eric.

Something Good

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Image by Eric, sunrise over the Poudre

1. Lines in the Sand: When the Beach Becomes a Canvas a video from Great Big Story. “Anyone can write their name in the sand, but Jim Denevan uses the beach to create stunning large-scale art. What started as a hobby over 20 years ago has resulted in worldwide recognition, and he’s created masterworks from Russia to Chile to Australia. At the end of the day, though, Jim’s just happy to find a new beach to make his canvas.”

2. Old Man Blogs At Cloud, a great post about blogging from Chuck Wendig on his blog Terrible Minds.

3. Good stuff from Dances with Fat: Stealing from Fat Positivity to Sell Diets – Looking at You “Biggest Loser” and Jillian Michaels Continues To Be A Horrible Human Being, This Time Dragging Lizzo Into It and The Minnesota Starvation Experiment Was Less Strict Than Modern Diets. In related news, Lizzo Issued A NSFW Clapback After Jillian Michaels Commented On Her Health, And I’m Clutching My Pearls.

4. Reading lists: I Read More Than 100 Books in 2019—Here Are the 10 I Recommend and The ZORA Canon: The 100 greatest books ever written by African American women.

5. The Next Generation of Meditation Teachers. “These eight young meditation teachers are so gifted, bringing a unique integrity, open-heartedness and wisdom to their work, that they’ve already earned a strong following.”

6. Grove Collaborative. “Grove started as an idea between three friends talking in a spare bedroom in San Francisco: ‘what if it was easy to find healthier home essentials?’ The belief that what we bring into our homes contributes to that homey, cozy feel prompted them to try to make their idea a reality.”

7. EP52 – The Diet Binge Cycle with Isabel Foxen Duke: Intuitive Bites Podcast.

8. Thanks for coming to my TED talk, an actual TED talk from The Bloggess.

9. advice to your high school self from Karen Walrond on Chookooloonks.

10. “Home” by Warsan Shire, (video).

11. 80-Year-Old Tortoise Becomes A First-Time Mom.

12. A letter to…my angry father. “What I do know is that you have never dealt with it, never sought help. Your deep feelings of loss and hurt come out at night, during family dinners, and instead of addressing that trauma, you blame yourself: you hate, you spit and you rage.”

13. A staggering 1 billion animals are now estimated dead in Australia’s fires.

14. She’s 7 and was born intersex. Why her parents elected to let her grow up without surgical intervention.

15. Haut-Relief Portraits of Animals Come Alive in Detailed Paper Sculptures by Calvin Nicholls.

16. ‘Star Trek: Picard’: Patrick Stewart on Why He Returned to the Final Frontier.

17. Here’s How the ‘Health at Every Size’ Movement Made Me a Better Trainer.

18. The Secret We’re Keeping from You. “Listen, your friends are hiding their mental illnesses from you.” In related news, Woman Explains A Lesser Known Symptom Of Depression And People Are Thanking Her.

19. Smirking All the Way to the Bank: Nick Sandmann Settles Lawsuit With CNN. Gross. He needs to divide the money up and compensate all the people he’s bullied and trolled online, because you absolutely know that the suffering he claims to have experienced is nowhere near the suffering he’s caused. In related news, His reaction when asked to name something President Trump has done well…

20. This Husky Picked Out Her Own Kitten To Take Home From Shelter

21. Recipe I want to try: Old Fashioned Buttermilk Sweet Bread.

22. How to Break Your Single-Use Plastics Habit.

23. The Meat-Lover’s Guide to Eating Less Meat on The New York Times. “Reducing your meat and dairy intake can help mitigate climate change. Melissa Clark has ideas for how to do it deliciously.”

24. America Has Never Cared About Sacred Sites. “Trump’s threat to destroy Iranian cultural sites is a dark national tradition, with the desecration of sacred tribal sites offering the blueprint.”

25. I Remain A “Catfish” Queer: On Love, The Midwest, and What We Think We Deserve.

26. Installation Reveals the Metaphoric Power of a Single Book Distorting a Solid Brick Wall.

Gratitude Friday

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Image by Eric

1. The Colorado sky. I love it so much because it’s blue so much of the time, but in the winter it is especially magical.

2. I’m still here. For real, this week was HARD. A dear friend got awful news, Sam hurt his back worse than we thought, Eric’s mom ended up in the hospital, and we dealt with a few other things I won’t talk about here, (don’t worry, Mom, I’ll email you all about it later today). Thank goodness for my tiny family, my friends, joyful movement, good books, good food, sleep, practice, and therapy. Also, clean water and biscuits & jam.

3. I finally finished my Curvy Yoga teacher certification. I got sidetracked finishing my 500 hour certification, quitting my job of 19 years, and coping with burnout, but I finished. Now I’ve moved on to getting some of the foundations for my new “business” set up, (I don’t know why, but to say I have a “business” sounds too weird, so I have to put it in quotes).

4. We got new furniture! You might not understand what a big deal this is. We’ve never had furniture that was new and matched or was any kind of intentional design. We still live like we are college roommates renting an apartment rather than a 26 year married pair of 52 year old home owners. We bought new rugs (so Sam won’t slip on the hardwoods and if he lies on the floor, he’ll be on something softer), a mini sectional, and new bookshelves this week. We are also going to get a console table to put our TV on. I hadn’t realized until we got it all set up how much I needed a fresh start, how much I’d appreciate the comfort and beauty. Of course, we ultimately ended up keeping one of our old sofas and a “vintage” mustard yellow velour recliner we inherited from Eric’s parents (they bought it new probably over 50 years ago) that Ringo loves, but it all works in the way we need it to work. Now if we can just keep Ringo from doing too much Parkour on and off the new couch. And also, WHY so MANY pillows?! Who uses all those?

5. My tiny family. The keep me sane and safe, and they make me laugh.

Seriously though: why must he insist on trying so hard to wreck himself?

He likes coffee

“Helping” me make biscuits, or rather waiting for me to drop some butter

Bonus joy: a warm shower, clean pjs, pjs that are decent enough I can wear them out of the house as pants, tea with Chloe’, hanging out with Mikalina, writing in the morning with a hot cup of cocoa coffee (half cocoa with marshmallows, half coffee), sitting in the sauna with Eric, clean sheets, a book so good you try really hard to stay awake so you can keep reading, good TV, clementines, going to the movies and getting popcorn, clarity about what I need, being able to afford new furniture, our “old” furniture becoming someone else’s “new” furniture, other people’s dogs, yoga taught by good teachers using props and good cuing, new to me music, good podcasts, baking, getting all the laundry done and put away, my new pen, being retired.

Something Good

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Image by Eric

1. A New Year’s wish from Jena Schwartz from a recent newsletter: “My wish for you in the new year, and for myself, is that we remember the things that bring us back to ourselves, and make space and time for them. I know this sounds simple and sometimes is anything but, so I also wish for you lots of patience, self-forgiveness, and grace…No matter what else, remember to start, keep going, and be good to yourself. Repeat this often, as you will probably get distracted by shiny objects, competing world crises, kids and pets, bosses and bills, the antics of your own monkey mind, and a thousand other things. That’s ok. That’s more than ok. That’s life! And life is here, now, for the living. Let’s not miss it. Just come back to ‘start’ and remember that you are always welcome here. ” Amen.

2. Paul Jarvis’s State of the Union 2020, his most recent Sunday Dispatch where he summarizes his year and looks forward to what comes next. I can’t stop thinking about what he says about “THE FIRE” and his “bottom line” at the end is that weird sort of dark optimism I love so much, giving me something to hold onto, to keep me afloat as the world burns.

3. Good stuff from from Dances with Fat, If You’re Considering Joining a Gym, and Health at Every Size and the Burden of Proof, and What Research Would Prove that Weight Loss Works because this:

To me (understanding that health is not an obligation, barometer of worthiness, or entirely within our control) the research that exists around weight and health made my choice to follow Health at Every Size blatantly obvious. Of course other people are allowed to make different choices for themselves, but if they want to try to convince me – including and especially if they are a healthcare practitioner trying to tell me that weight loss will make me healthier – they’ll need to provide some actual evidence.

Finally, just to be clear, even if there was research that becoming thinner was possible and would lead to greater health, fat people still wouldn’t be obligated to pursue it (just like nobody is forced to get enough sleep if they can, just because it’s shown to improve health,) because fat people have a right to live in fat bodies without shame, stigma, bullying or oppression and it doesn’t matter why we’re fat, or if we could become thin(ner).

4. ‘Yoga With Adriene’ Shares How Yoga Can Help You Achieve Your New Year’s Resolutions. (video) “Kicking off a Start TODAY series to help you achieve your New Year’s resolutions, correspondent Harry Smith joins the show to talk about the month-long yoga challenge he’s taking. ‘Yoga with Adriene’ YouTube star Adriene Mishler visits the show to explain what yoga can do for you.”

5. Minimalist Family HOUSE TOUR. (video)

6. Walls of Love provides Cleveland homeless with hope. (video) “Walls of Love founder Holly Jackson of Cleveland, Ohio, collects items for the homeless and displays them on pop-up walls. Having once been left homeless herself after escaping an abusive relationship, Jackson knows firsthand the stigma that comes with asking for help.”

7. 20 Questions that Will Open Your Mind in 2020. These would make great journaling prompts. Another set of great prompts came from Melissa Toler‘s most recent newsletter. They are: “What if you realized that you don’t need to fix anything about yourself? What would you do? How would you feel? Where would you go? Who would have the pleasure of spending time with you? What conversations would you have with your friends? With yourself?”

8. My decade in a zine from Austin Kleon. “I accepted this challenge from Malaka Gharib (author of I Was Their American Dream) on Twitter: ‘december 31st challenge make an 8-page zine about your decade don’t spend more than 20 minutes on it.'” This is a fun idea!

9. Priorities from Seth Godin. “Your boat, your compass.”

10. Write With A Knife To Your Back, The Cliff’s Edge At Your Feet from Chuck Wendig on Terrible Minds. His yearly new year’s writer’s resolutions are one of my favorite things.

11. 9 Climate Activists of Color You Should Know. “Canadian water protector Autumn Peltier, the indigenous-led Guardians of the Forest, and Zero Hour’s Zeena Abdulkarim are helping lead the youth climate movement.”

12. Here’s how you can help Australia’s bushfire victims. In related news, Australian fires: Everything we know and how you can help, and How To Help Animals In The Australian Wildfires, and How to help victims of Australia’s apocalyptic wildfires, and How to Help Victims of Australia’s Fires on The New York Times.

13. Cello Teacher Calls Out Student’s Mom Who Sent Racist Email Saying Her Son Smelled ‘Ethnic’ After Lessons.

14. Artist turns wood into amazing things. (video) “Watching the process was honestly sort of boring, but the finished products are really cool.”

15. This Korean tattoo artist is helping pet owners show their love. (video) They are SO realistic!

16. Why I’m Not Dieting In 2020, a video from Fat Girl Flow. “#nodiet2020 starts now! Every year for the last 7 or so years Ive re-commited to not dieting for my well being. Do you. I’ll be over here doing me…and here’s why!”

17. Recipes I want to try: Lemon Meltaway Cookies, and White Cake Recipe, and 5 Ways To Make Chickpea Taste Delicious.

18. 6 Ways Growing Up With A Toxic Father Figure Turned Me Into A Stronger Woman.

19. 2020 So Black: 20 Black Films And TV Worth Looking Forward To.

20. These 22 alternatives will let you live a Facebook-free life in 2020.

21. How To Recognize A Fake News Story. “9 helpful tips to stop yourself from sharing false information.”

22. The Next Storm Comes, a New Year’s poem from Rosemerry Trommer.

23. 50 Wonderful Things From 2019.

24. 17 Memoirs Feminists Should Read in 2020.

25. Maria Bamford Melds Speed Dating and Standup Comedy on The New York Times.

26. Couple find novel way to downsize after 45 years in the same house. What a great idea.

Gratitude Friday

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1. Happy New Year! All our Christmas presents got put away or put to use, and our tree came down and got recycled yesterday. I miss the lights, but the herons will stay inside in the corner by the front window at least until the snow melts.

2. Morning walks. I missed all of them this week. I was subbing some yoga classes and the first part of the week was super cold and Sam’s restricted to just short walks again as he tweaked his back on the ice, but Eric takes lovely pictures so I feel like I was there.

3. Expecting bad news but it turning out okay. It puts everything into perspective when you are expecting the worst and that doesn’t happen. It makes all the other stuff you were worried about before seem like not such a big deal. Also, therapy helps.

4. Practice. Yoga, writing, meditation, and dog. These all help too, (see #3).

5. My tiny family. Sam tweaked his back again on the ice, so he’s been getting lots of special attention, (the above picture is Eric using the cold laser on him). It’s trash day today because of the holiday, and both boys are at the window telling off the trash collectors right now. It’s super cute because sometimes they start off barking and then switch to singing and howling, which Sam isn’t very good at but that makes it even cuter. I’m happy to have another week to spend with Eric before he goes back to work.

IMG_20200102_143457_836

Bonus joy: our new ice cream maker from Eric’s mom and dad, hanging out with Mikalina, going to lunch and a movie with Chelsey and Jon (and the movie being good), good TV, good movies, good books (lots of new ones as Christmas gifts I can’t wait to read), making a full page “2020 vision” to-do list and crossing off four things the very first day, updating my resume and realizing I have been working hard and accomplishing a lot, long naps, reading in bed at night while Eric and the dogs sleep, subbing a yoga class and seeing students I haven’t seen in awhile, Sarah’s New Year’s Day yoga mandala class on a day when I really really really needed it, realizing my car will be paid off in another year, the new rugs we ordered (we finally have a dog old enough that we can legitimately worry about him slipping and falling), getting in the pool and sauna at the gym, sunshine, leftover sweet potato and black bean quesadillas, clementines.

Something Good

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Lee Martinez Farm, image by Eric

1. Some “What Ifs” For Dealing With Fatphobia In The New Year from Dances with Fat. In related news, How to Deal When Your Friends Go On Diets and New Year’s Resolutions That Aren’t Diets, also from Dances with Fat.

2. More book lists! My reading year, 2019 from Austin Kleon and 100 Must Read Books of 2019.

3. CREATE.2020 with Karen Walrond, “a 15-day, self-guided journaling course to help you reflect on the previous year, dream about the new one, and help guide you to actualize your best intentions for 2020.”

4. When Your Expectations of Others is Making You Frustrated from Zen Habits. In related news, Toward peace, from Seth Godin.

5. Journaling Prompts to Relieve Stress: 10 for Morning + 10 for Evening from Be More With Less. Even if you don’t journal, these would work as contemplations too, I suspect.

6. These are the charities where your money will do the most good, a great set of tips and strategies for giving.

7. Artists Photographs 25 Kids From Around The World With What They Eat In One Week.

8. 7 Questions for the New Year.

9. The Best Advice You’ve Ever Received (and Are Willing to Pass On) on The New York Times.

10. I Was A Cable Guy. I Saw The Worst Of America. “A glimpse of the suburban grotesque, featuring Russian mobsters, Fox News rage addicts, a caged man in a sex dungeon, and Dick Cheney.”

11. 20 Tiny Changes You Can Make in Your Home to Make Life Simpler in 2020.

12. Hand-Stitched Flowers and Landscapes Revitalize Found Photographs by Artist Han Cao.

13. Ilana Glazer Strikes Out On Her Own In New Stand-Up Special.

14. 1,000 people sent me their addiction treatment stories. Here’s what I learned. “Here are four reasons America’s addiction treatment system is broken.”

15. Why America loves — and hates — outspoken young women. “Women like Greta Thunberg and Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez were leaders in the 2010s. And they were vilified for it.”

16. Civil Rights Leader Rep. John Lewis To Start Treatment For Pancreatic Cancer. May he be well.

17. How Women Are Using Knitting And Needlework As A Form Of Protest. From a year ago, but still relevant.

18. 10 Black Web Series To Put On Your Binge-Watching List For The Holidays.

19. You Can Now Download a Collection of Ancient Japanese Wave Illustrations for Free.

20. Move over, Avengers! This little girl is one incredible superhero. (video)

21. #NotAllHistorians: Some White People Are Upset That the New York Times’ 1619 Project Isn’t Centered in Whiteness.

22. Recipe I want to try: Onion Bacon Jam.

23. How a Stock Photography Project Is Confronting Fat Bias.

24. Philadelphia Man Wakes Up To Find Malnourished, Stray Dog In His Home After Accidentally Leaving His Front Door Open.

25. Calories In = Calories Out is BS.

26. If You’ve Survived A Gaslighting Parent, You Won’t Love ‘A Beautiful Day In the Neighborhood.’

27. Parents Give Toddler A Banana As A Prank And The Video Of Her Delighted Reaction Goes Viral.