January | 2016 | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

Poudre River, image by Eric

1. Truth: I used to believe that I could keep bad things from happening. This isn’t a joke, not an exaggeration. I really thought that if I were diligent — if I paid attention, prepared, did my research, was smart and good — I could stop bad things from happening, or at least from being so bad when they did happen. This belief was toxic, robbed my life of joy, and as an adult even led to a period of post traumatic stress disorder that lasted for years.

2. Truth: This belief lingers like an echo. I catch myself when there’s an issue, a problem, a threat, or even the hint of something not quite right, shifting into “I have to fix this” mode. I can usually interrupt the habitual response pretty quickly, talk myself down from the ledge, but sometimes even still I’m pretty deep into it before I realize I’m doing it again, and at that point it can be hard to let go.

3. Truth: I can’t control everything, or anything. I can’t stop bad things from happening, and it’s also not entirely my fault if they do. It’s great to check in with myself, consider if anything I did contributed, or if I’m doing anything to generate excess suffering, but I don’t have to walk around all the time feeling responsible for all the things. My power lies in how I respond to what happens. And if I relax, trust in my own inherent goodness, that response comes from a place of wisdom and compassion.

One wish: May we relax, trust in our fundamental goodness, and know deep in our bones that even if the worst happens we will find a way.

Poudre River, image by Eric

1. The 100 Day Promise from Sandi Amorim. “The 100 Day Promise is a practice that guides you through the process of change in an in-depth and soulful way.” I mentioned this last week, but wanted to tell you again in case you missed it because the program started on January 1^st, but Sandi is leaving registration open until the 7^th. You should also check out her book , The 100 Day Promise: A Guide To Changing From The Inside Out.

2. Things you should quit this year (Sugar is not one of them!). This last part, “Health and fitness comes in all shapes and sizes. Truly. You cannot tell by looking at someone how fit or well they are. You don’t know if they have strong mental health, absence of illness, physical strength, and stamina or if they have a disordered approach to food, suffer from mental health issues or struggle with fatigue. A person’s size cannot tell you these things.” Word.

3. Nigella Lawson: Clean Eating Is ‘a Way to Hide an Eating Disorder.’

4. 9,500-Year-Old Tree Found in Sweden Is The World’s Oldest Tree. So cool.

5. Here’s How Many People Fatally Overdosed On Marijuana Last Year.

6. What 8 body positive activists want you to know about losing weight in the new year.

7. The 50 Funniest Tweets From Women In 2015. So funny.

8. Baby trying bacon for the first time. 🙂

9. There are performances, and then there are performances. It takes a certain kind of woman to go on stage in an ankle length fur coat (ethics of wearing fur aside). It takes whole other kind of woman to take that coat off, throw it on the floor, and SING.

10. Onion Dip from Scratch recipe. Confession: I love onion dip and a good crisp salty chip.

11. Carrie Fisher to haters: Youth and beauty are not accomplishments. What makes me crazy about this is I saw the movie, and thought “she looks amazing.”

12. In Defense of Food and the Rise of ‘Healthy-ish’ “A new PBS documentary and Bon Appetit’s January issue espouse a radically moderate approach to eating.”

13. President Barack Obama on Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. I’ve said it before, will say it again: I’d vote for him again if I could.

14. White Awake. “White Awake’s mission is to bring contemplative spiritual practice to white affinity work around race and inner transformation.”

15. Don’t Cry Over Oprah’s New Weight Watchers Commercial. Amen.

16. The Weight-Inclusive versus Weight-Normative Approach to Health: Evaluating the Evidence for Prioritizing Well-Being over Weight Loss from the Journal of Obesity.

17. Manifesting 2016: Consciously Creating Your Year from Andrea Scher, self-paced and pay what you can.

18. Happy New Year, Weirdos from Renegade Mothering.

19. Change, Part 1: A New You For a New Year a great dharma talk from Philip Moffitt. I especially love this: In our saying “Happy New Year” one of the things we may be meaning is “This year, may you cease to be the cause of your own suffering.”

20. Happy Notes from Jennifer Belthoff. Such a great idea.

21. A Celebration of Ravi’s Life. “In 2014 Maggie Doyne took malnourished Ravi in at her school and home in Nepal and saved his life. A little over a year later, he passed away in a tragic accident. All money raised will go to Ravi’s siblings in Nepal.” This story is so heartbreaking. Thankfully, this fundraiser gives us the opportunity to do something.

22. Wisdom from Rumi, “I have been a seeker and I still am, but I stopped asking the books and the stars. I started listening to the teaching of my soul.”

23. A Sentiment for Blazing from Danielle LaPorte. I love the last part, “let your pure faith burn the way.”

24. A beautiful New Year’s wish from Andrea Gibson, a poet even in her Facebook posts.

25. Dear Oprah: Please Stop Projecting Your Insecurities Onto Me. Amen.

26. When You’re Both Overweight and Anorexic.

27. 23 Things To Do To Improve Your Mental Health In 2016. A good list.

28. Wisdom from Seth Godin: Surefire predictions and Who is Us?

29. What I learned not drinking for two years.

30. Speak For Yourself Oprah from Dances With Fat. Word. Also from Ragen, New Year’s Revolutions.

31. How to write a simple and beautiful manifesto from Alexandra Franzen. In her latest newsletter, she also shared a link to this cover of Drake’s Hold On, We’re Going Home that’s super dreamy.

32. 10 Best Articles on Writing of 2015. Disclaimer: I haven’t read all these, so I can’t promise these are truly the 10 best.