June | 2015 | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

1. Peonies. From my garden, and a few roses too.

2. Our garden. Flowers, fruits, and veggies.

3. Smart phones. How did we grocery shop before we could take pictures and text them to each other?

4. My boys. Ringo continuing to grow up little by little while still retaining his ability to make me laugh with his crazy antics. Sam behaving himself so well on a play date with a puppy he was meeting for the first time.

5. Sleepy dogs. I love how sweet they look, how willing they are to cuddle, the deep sighs, the way they chase and bark at stuff in their dreams.

Bonus joy: how green everything is, how well our garden is doing because of all the rain and the sun, strawberries from our own garden, upick berries from Garden Sweet, oatmeal chocolate chip cookies as big as my head, Orange is the New Black Season 3, having the money to be able to put a new roof on the house and whatever else needs done, good friends who will listen to me complain, a partner who will listen to me cry, long walks with the dogs, yoga, Professor Blastoff podcasts, Skype dates with creative and interesting women, trusting that if I keep showing up I will figure out how to write this book that I’m trying to write, naps, summer vacation, being able to change my mind.

The first peony opening in my garden

1. Truth: I read a lot of books at once. It’s a bad habit I picked up in graduate school, where each week I had to make it through hundreds of pages of content, and no matter how good it might be I could never read just a single book from beginning to end because there was too much other reading to do. That approach stuck with me. Right now I’m actively reading five books, and in the midst of at least ten more.

2. Truth: Through books, I can access so much wisdom. But I’m not a snob. I think that there is the same kind of wisdom available online, on television, in films, on stage, etc. — anywhere that humans are endeavoring to tell the truth, to share their stories, there is wisdom to be found.

3. Truth: At least once a day, but usually more, I encounter truth that has the potential to change everything. This morning, it happened while reading Tara Brach’s Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life with the Heart of a Buddha. I saw myself so clearly in the way she talked about how we cover up our discomfort with short term solutions and distract ourselves from our deepest longings with busyness. It goes back to what Adreanna Limbach said about laziness. I can see how easily I get confused, but also know there is a way out.

One wish: May we reconnect with our deepest longing, may the next necessary step be obvious and easy, and may we continue to be patient with ourselves and the process.