March | 2015 | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

I finally flipped my calendar to the new month.

1. It’s Friday. This has been a long week with a complicated and busy schedule and I am looking forward to letting go a little, cleaning up.

2. Practice. I flipped my calendar over to March (finally) and the quote was from Pema Chödrön, “The meditative space is like the big sky — spacious, vast enough to accommodate anything that arises.” Yoga, meditation, writing, and dog all simultaneously challenge and soothe me.

3. Blogging. I really do love it, and today I get to talk about it with a “Writing in the Arts and Humanities” class on campus. They’ve been posting questions for me on their class blog and I can’t wait to hear how I answer.

4. Sweet Sam and Ringo Blue. These two have been a handful this week, loud and rowdy and misbehaved. I confess I had a few moments of fantasizing about having no dogs, but I would never really go through with it. I love these dumb jerks way too much.

Ringo sassing Sam.

5. Eric. He walked the dogs for me yesterday morning because it was so cold (2 degrees). He leaves me love notes on the kitchen counter. At night, he stands in the kitchen wearing a blanket around his shoulders like a superhero cape. He drinks too much coffee when he’s busy and hates getting behind on his work. He cooks for me, (sometimes it’s pie). He laughs at the same dumb things I do.

Bonus joy: Tuesday lunches with one of my favorite people, tomato and split pea soup, toast, clean cold water, snow, long walks with the dogs, people who are really good at ~~herding cats~~ facilitating meetings, being able to offer some wisdom, going slow, being able to trust myself.

Ringo and Sam each have their own style of couching

1. Truth: I am allowing myself to be too busy. Even though I said I wouldn’t be busy this semester, was going to stop doing that, here I am. I’m over scheduled, over committed, trying to do too much. There’s no space, no gaps, no room to breathe and be still.

2. Truth: Too busy is so harmful. My health suffers, my relationships become difficult, work is a challenge, and my thinking is confused. I start taking shortcuts and am no longer doing my best, for myself or anyone else. I skip the gym, don’t get enough sleep, eat crap without thinking. I feel bewildered. I am unable to prioritize and have a constant nagging feeling that I’m forgetting something. In this compromised state, I don’t stop until I get to the point of total overwhelm.

3. Truth: I need to slow down. Take care, pace myself, check myself before I wreck myself. Luckily most of the things I do aren’t that important in a global sense. If I have to give something up or it takes longer to be finished, probably no one will die as a result.

One wish: When we find that we are too busy, that we can’t keep up and are running ourselves into the ground, may we pause, find some stillness and space, notice where we are and be gentle. May we know deep in our bones that even if we did nothing at all, we’d still be enough.