Tag Archives: Heart’s Work

Gratitude Friday

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This post started as a mashup of The Little Bliss List and Joy Jam, and as such is meant to celebrate: the little things that brought me hope and happiness this week, the sweet stuff of life, those small gifts that brought me joy this week. By sharing them, I not only make public my gratitude, but maybe also help you notice your own good stuff and send some positive energy out into the world.

1. A friend’s healthy new baby. The story of her labor and his delivery–a baby too big to get out on his own–makes me think about how many mothers and babies have died in childbirth, how if this friend had lived in a different time or place, she might have been one of those women, he might have been one of those babies. It makes me grateful for the help and care she received.

2. Physical therapy for Dexter. Talk about luck–we live in a culture where our pets get better healthcare than many people in the world, people who either can’t afford it or simply don’t have access. I am so grateful I can provide that for him, want the same for all of us, people and animals. He’s getting much better, was cleared this week to go on a few short hikes.

3. Avocados. Yes, I am still obsessed with them. I might have a problem. I am finding that I like them so much better than cheese on a sandwich. My current favorite sandwich is organic multigrain bread, Nayonaise, honey mustard, organic turkey breast, avocado and spinach, with a few organic potato chips for a little bit of crunch.

4. Spring. It really is coming, (here?). I hadn’t realized how much I missed the sun, the warmth, the song of the birds, the green and the blossom.

5. The chance to do good work, paid and otherwise. Yesterday at my paid work, I sent an inquiry to Brene’ Brown’s management to get some numbers so we can write a proposal, attempt to get the funding to have her invited to give a talk at CSU. I signed it, “I look forward to hearing from you.” What I meant was “OMG, I am so excited, squeeeeee, *please please please let this work*.” And this week I sent out a submission for publication, my first in a long time.

Bonus Joy: Another week with Dexter. He teaches me to let go, to surrender and be here now, to open up to the joy and beauty in this moment.

Shower, Eat, and Meditate

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janmorningskyEven though I’ve been posting Small Stones and I rewrote my About page, I’ve skipped some of my regular posts lately, didn’t do a Three Truths and One Wish this week, haven’t been Wishcasting regularly, and in general, I feel like I haven’t been “around” as much lately. And yet, it’s been a necessary shift.

This past week, I started as a teaching assistant for Mondo Beyondo. That course is even more amazing than I remember, and this time through, I’m seeing so many new things, still getting so much out of it for myself as a student. I’m so eager for Andrea to feel like it was right and good to ask me to help, and so excited for the wonderful people involved, so happy to be there that I have to be careful to not run around like a big clumsy Great Dane puppy, barking and knocking things over and generally annoying everyone with my enthusiasm. I’m trying to be really careful to keep the “volume” down, but I just love that class and Andrea’s work so much–but you already knew that. (P.S. Cultivating Courage starts on Monday, January 14th, and there’s still room in Mondo Beyondo).

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In other news, I’m trying not to panic that I have to start back at my paid work on Monday. This morning, I made a “Big To-Do” list of everything I have going on next week, in the hopes I could put that all aside, having it now organized, and not have to think about it anymore this weekend. That sort of worked, but then again all day I’ve been thinking today is Sunday, that I start back tomorrow, and that doesn’t feel nice.

Here’s the real issue: I currently have two full-time jobs, my paid work and my heart’s work. And it is about to get even crazier, because on Monday two more classes will start, Cultivating Courage and The Story of You. I have two long meetings next week, and had to schedule things like getting a haircut, going to the eye doctor, and having the plumber finally come fix our leaky sink in the bathroom, along with going back to CSU and doing that work.

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My strategy, my mantra has become “shower, eat, and meditate.” I already have a set morning routine, what happens from 4:30-8:00 am–feed the dogs, drink half a cup of coffee while I write my morning pages, check in with my email and Facebook and blog, and then either walk the dogs, go to yoga or the gym. Where I can get stuck is when I come back home to get ready for work, what happens between 8 and 9 am. I got in the habit while on break of “just checking one thing, real quick” before getting in the shower, which would usually lead to me being on the computer for two or three hours instead, and by then being so hungry that I’d eat whatever was fast, not what I really wanted or what was healthy, and once I showered, it would be so late, I’d think “I can’t meditate now, I have work I want to do, so I’ll meditate later,” and later never came because by the time I’d stop working, I was too tired, would allow myself to skip it.

So this mantra, “shower, eat, and mediate,” reminds me to take care of myself, both literally (these are the things I need to do first thing, that I seem to need help remembering, that I tend to skip in order to help or love someone else) and it also triggers a bigger remembering of necessary self-care, self-love, reminding me of the place to begin, to let go and come back to center.

And this busyness, this activity is just how things are going to have to be for awhile. Unless my fairy godmother shows up, I win the lottery, or a kind benefactor decides to fund my heart’s work, I need to keep my job that pays. As for the rest, I will keep taking tiny steps, dreaming my big dreams, anticipating mystery and magic and surprises, and learning to love and care for myself along the way. This is my life, and I am completely in love with it.