November | 2022 | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

1. Democrats retain control of the Senate after holding Nevada seat. In related news, A Guide to Election-Related Self-Compassion. “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence. It is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”

2. The Case for ‘Hibernating’ During Winter on The New York Times. “Our urge to decelerate around late autumn and throughout winter ought to be heeded. The instinct to rest more in that quiet space of time between when the last leaves fall and the first fireflies arrive resonates with ancient human and biological rhythms. We should listen to it.”

3. 20 best cosy UK cottages for a winter break.

4. Mysterious Creatures Emerge from Recycled Materials in Sculptures by Spencer Hansen.

5. The Acrobatic Immigrant Who Invented Pilates in a Prisoner of War Camp. “Interned during WWI, circus entertainer Joseph Pilates used found materials and his fellow prisoners as his test lab, and imagined an exercise system that would captivate millions.”

6. The big idea: why we shouldn’t try to be happy. “Happiness might seem like a noble goal – but striving for it can be counterproductive.”

7. Recipes I want to try: Roasted Garlic Parmesan Brussels Sprouts, and Caramelized Onion Dip, and Salvadoran Pupusas As Made By Curly And His Abuelita.

8. Noah Johnson’s upcycled wearable art. (video) “Noah Johnson is a 21 year old Tasmanian-born fashion designer who has taken TikTok by storm with his upcycled, wearable art.”

9. Tegan and Sara Serve Up A Sweet, Queer Coming Of Age Story In Freevee’s “High School.”

10. Rob Delaney Wants You to Know How He’s Feeling (It May Ruin Your Day) on The New York Times. “In his memoir ‘A Heart That Works,’ the comedian and actor grapples with the pain of losing a child, and how to keep living.”

11. The Mountain Dogs. “A short film following two beloved golden retrievers, Sampson and Baylor, as they climb to the summit of the Pinnacle Trail in Stowe, Vermont each day without their owners.”

12. A Shortcut for Caring for Others (and Being Cared For Yourself).

13. Confessions of an Introvert Who Struggles to Relax.

14. The leaf blower parable from Seth Godin.

15. How Are We Meeting This Moment? on Lion’s Roar. “Stephanie Kaza invites Buddhist communities, and specifically Buddhist leaders, to take a serious look at how they are—or aren’t—responding to the climate crisis.”

16. 7 Things You Definitely Won’t Need This Year (or ever again) on Be More With Less.

17. A gratitude zine from Austin Kleon.

18. Love Everyone: A Guide for Spiritual Activists on Lion’s Roar. “Real political change must be spiritual. Real spiritual practice has to be political. Buddhist teachers Sharon Salzberg and Rev. angel Kyodo williams on how we can bring the two worlds together to build a more just and compassionate society.”

19. A Few Rules For Predicting The Future by Octavia E. Butler. “When a student asks Butler what the answer is to ending the suffering in the world, she replies, ‘…there’s no single answer that will solve all of our future problems. There’s no magic bullet. Instead there are thousands of answers–at least. You can be one of them if you choose to be.'”

20. How to Handle Confrontation When You’re an Introvert Who’d Rather Avoid It.

21. How to donate food to a food bank this Thanksgiving on the Feeding America blog, which includes links to a search tool that will help you find your local food bank. HOW is this a place where someone can pay $44 billion for something as dumb as Twitter AND people are still HUNGRY, don’t have enough to eat, don’t have regular access to such a simple and essential resource?! Seriously, it enrages me…

22. Why I Don’t Celebrate Thanksgiving. “Indigenous chef Elena Terry shares what Thanksgiving means to her.”

23. 100 year old adopts a senior dog. (video) #lifegoals

24. Accessing Joy and Finding Connection in the Midst of Struggle. An episode of Brené Brown’s Unlocking Us podcast with Karon Walrond. “If you’re struggling with how to be fully connected in your life and feel joy and acknowledge beauty and also fight for the things that we need to fight for right now, this will be a great podcast for you.”

25. This Is One of the Most Beautiful Tiny Houses You’ll Ever See. (video) The Living Big In A Tiny House YouTube channel is a fun way to spend some time.

26. These lines from poet Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer:

“Let my gift to the world be
my constancy, a devotion to openness,
my willingness to be with what is.
Let my gift to myself be patience
as I tend what is dense and dark.”

1. Ringo. I’m just so grateful he’s recovering, has his spunk back. This morning I was listening to a meditation that used bilateral sound (a technique for nervous system regulation), which means you need to use headphones. I was sitting with my eyes closed when I felt warm breath on my face and then got a kiss on my chin — Ringo had come in to check on me. It’s the tiniest of moments that make all the hard ones bearable. It’s a sort of math that makes absolutely no sense, and I’m so grateful for it.

2. Feeding myself. I’m not as good at this as I’d like to be, especially early in the day, anything before lunchtime really. If you somehow missed it, I had two or three active eating disorders that started when I was about 14 years old and that I finally started therapy for about nine years ago, (yes, that’s about 40 years of disordered eating). I’m not sure I’ll ever be truly “recovered” but with a lot of therapy, support, and practice, I’m learning how to take better care of myself.

2. Morning walks, even the ones that happen in the afternoon. Most of the gold is gone now, but it’s still gorgeous out there.

4. Practice. Meditation in particular recently has been such a help, keeping me grounded and here.

5. My tiny family, tiny home, tiny life. It doesn’t matter what else happens, as long as I have this.

Bonus joy: the three hour nap I took yesterday which I obviously really needed, Wild Writing with Laurie and my Friday morning writing sangha, making art with Janice, texting with Chloe’, sunshine on a cold day, Eric and Ringo lounging in the backyard or on the couch together, hormone replacement therapy, anti-anxiety meds, vaccines, having easily accessible videos of my dogs who aren’t here anymore, being able to finally send Chloe’ cute videos and memes with kids and the reason why — the sweetest little boy, other people’s dogs, the barista at the Starbucks inside the grocery store, extreme discounts on Halloween candy, birds in the feeder (although apparently someone pooped inside it this week), other people getting therapy, spices — the smells and tastes, new music from some of my favorite artists, good TV, watching Diners Drive -ins and Dives with Eric, really yummy salads, honey roasted peanuts, the heater for the pool at the gym getting fixed, sitting in the sauna with Eric, texting with Chris and Mom, the hum of our furnace, being retired in that I never have to leave the house unless I WANT to, being able to email or text or use an app for all the things that used to be done on the phone or in person, stretching, a warm shower, the way Ringo makes himself a nest of blankets and pillows on the couch, having hair that doesn’t need constantly cut or styled or fussed with, reading in bed at night while Eric and Ringo sleep.