Three Truths and One Wish

From our walk this morning

From our walk this morning

1. Truth: This is not sustainable. And by “this,” I mean the way I’m doing life. I am trying to do all the things, and then some. Even if I weren’t a highly sensitive introvert with an autoimmune disorder and lingering PTSD, it would be too much for me to keep up.

2. Truth: Even though I know that, I don’t know how to stop, or even slow down. My therapist asked me what I might be able to let go of, and I couldn’t think of a single thing. Not only that, what I started thinking about instead were all the things I wanted to add, needed to do in addition to what I’m already doing.

3. Truth: I hope the solution doesn’t arise from the ashes of a full on burnout. I’d really like to figure this out before hitting some awful rock bottom. I’d like to make choices about what I want and what to do from a place where I feel like I have options, not a place of chaos, panic, or collapse.

One wish: May my choices come from pure love and wisdom, reflecting sanity and clarity rather than fear or confusion or exhaustion.

14 thoughts on “Three Truths and One Wish

  1. Sherry R. Belul

    I love you. My wish is that by writing that, you have created an invitation to your higher self to help you scale back in a way that feels loving and whole … and not as if you are being deprived of anything. My wish is that the response will come sweetly, on the wings of a butterfly or hummingbird. xo

    Reply
  2. tinakomi

    Sweet Jill, I wish I could write as beautifully as Ms. Sherry. So I’ll simply say ditto that. And add how grateful I am to be able to call you friend. XOXO

    Reply
  3. Melinda

    I’ve been there, Jill, and though I did almost hit bottom and I did change some things rather radically, the underlying issue is still there. So I add on again, and add on again and I can feel the tension increasing.
    May we pause, breathe, rest, and keep trying to simplify the need/want to do list.

    Reply
  4. Kira Elliott

    I know this place all too well. At the beginning of summer my therapist challenged me to take the summer “off”. Meaning no teaching, no side hustle, no projects. I still have my demanding day job but she challenged me to take time to just do the things I enjoy with the rest of my time. Riding my bike, hiking, painting. A challenge to slow down and rest. This has been so hard and yet it is the first time in my life I gifting myself space for me to exist without feeling like I have earn my right to be here. I feel so calm and peaceful doing less. I can’t remember a time I felt this way.

    I love reading your reflections and your journey. I know you have wisdom and courage to listen to your heart and know how best to care for yourself.

    Reply
    1. jillsalahub Post author

      What’s funny is I took the summer completely off. Maybe it’s the reentry that makes it feel so hard. And those last two sentences you wrote especially help so much. ❤

      Reply

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