Day of Rest


the beach at Waldport, where half my heart lives

On October 1st, Humans of New York posted the following. The picture wasn’t what drew me in, although she is a beautiful woman, it’s what she said. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since, keep wondering where I need to go deeper.

“If you could give one piece of advice to a large group of people, what would it be?”

“When a wave comes, go deep.”

“I think I’m going to need an explanation for that one.”

“There’s three things you can do when life sends a wave at you. You can run from it, but then it’s going to catch up and knock you down. You can also fall back on your ego and try to stand your ground, but then it’s still going to clobber you. Or you can use it as an opportunity to go deep, and transform yourself to match the circumstances. And that’s how you get through the wave.”

This reminds me of a story I heard Pema Chödrön tell once, about an interview she had with Chögyam Trungpa where she asked him some version of “My life is falling apart, I’m totally miserable, and what should I do?” and his reply was,

Well, it’s like being in the ocean when the waves are really rough and high. They knock you over and you find yourself on the floor of the ocean with your face in the sand. The sand is getting in your nose and your mouth and your eyes and the waves are holding you down. But then the wave recedes and you stand back up and you walk until the next waves comes in and knocks you down and the same thing keeps happening. And each time you just stand back up and after awhile it seems to you that the waves are getting smaller and smaller, (from How I met Rinpoche).

So today, on this day of rest, there is this: with each difficulty, within struggle, we can go deeper, and with practice, we become stronger — in both ways, one can “transform yourself to match the circumstances.” This seems to me to be really good news, knowing that suffering is fundamentally workable.

2 thoughts on “Day of Rest

    1. jillsalahub Post author

      Stevyn, I agree that Trungpa is a confusing character. There are many things about him as a human being that just don’t make sense to me. I came to his teachings by way of Pema Chödrön, but he was not my direct teacher and I never met him, so everything I know about him is secondhand. This has happened to me in other cases, where the teaching and the person don’t seem to match up, and I’ve decided that for myself, if the teaching turns out through my experience to be true, then it’s true regardless of how it came to me, how I found it. The Buddha supposedly said, “Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense,” and that makes sense to me.


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