December | 2016 | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

Great Stupa of Dharmakaya, Shambhala Mountain Center

1. Fearlessly Creative: A Meditation and Writing Retreat, the reason why I’m posting this on Thursday instead of Friday. I’m leaving this afternoon and have made every effort to get everything I needed to done so I can leave and just simply be on retreat while I’m gone. This is the fifth time I’ve gone on retreat with Susan Piver, and the fourth time to this one in particular. I love her, I love this place, and I adore the practice. I’m so grateful I can afford to go, that my sweet husband agrees to it, even though I’ll be gone for his birthday.

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2. Eric. It’s his birthday tomorrow, but since I won’t be here, I made him open his presents this morning. I am going to miss him while I’m gone — walking the dogs with him, hearing him laugh, the way he talks to the dogs when he thinks no one else is listening, the stupid jokes we make that probably only we would find funny, falling asleep next to him, spending the morning while it’s still dark sitting together in the living room with our Christmas tree and lights and Happy Hearth DVD and sleeping dogs.

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3. Our Christmas tree. I’m so glad we got one this year. It’s just so sweet and twinkly.

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4. A great night out with good friends. We ate an amazing dinner at a fabulous, beautiful place (the Boulder Dushanbe Tea House) and saw a hilarious show (Tig makes me laugh until my face hurts).

Boulder Dushanbe Tea House

5. Ringo. This dude never fails to cheer me up. He’s just so goofy and cute sometimes.

Christmas couching

I use this folding card table to wrap Christmas presents. Ringo uses it to get a better view of the street.

Those ears!

6. Sam. He turned seven years old this week. He’s such a good guy, so sensitive and sweet.

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What seven looks like

What eleven weeks old looked like, his first day as a Salahub

7. Morning walks in the snow. So pretty.

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Bonus joy: a neighbor’s dog who’d been lost showed up at their back door two days later and barked to be let in — stinky and tired but otherwise fine, clementines, knowing that sometimes I don’t need to give anything away, setting boundaries (I didn’t used to be too good at this), saying “no,” changing my mind, snow tires, practice, getting enough sleep, soaking in the tub, trusting myself, Voxing with Justine, texting with my brother, letters from my mom, the cheer of Christmas in a dark season.

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1. Hey, listen to your emotions, a great chart posted by Andrea Gibson.

2. Putting the Ass in Aspirational from Dances with Fat.

This idea of “aspirational” images is far too often used as a way to justify reinforcing the current stereotype of beauty which is typically thin, white, cisgender, able-bodied (and which, thanks to Photoshop, at this point is only actually achievable via digital enhancement.) Representation matters. Seeing people who look like you – whether it’s in athletics, or television and movies, or on stage, or doing whatever it is that you want to do – is important. Denying people role models who look like them isn’t aspirational, it’s cruel, and it’s oppressive, and it’s bullshit.

We each get to choose what we aspire to, and none of us is obligated to aspire to a stereotype that is used to exclude and oppress us and others. We have the opportunity to speak out against the idea that the choice to exclude so many people is doing anything other than putting the ass in aspirational.

3. Harvard Has a Free Online Course on Buddhism That You Can Take Right Now.

4. She became the nation’s first Somali American lawmaker. A month later, she was harassed in a D.C. cab for being Muslim.

5. The 50 Funniest Tweets From Women In 2016.

6. Over 2,000 U.S. veterans are standing with the protesters at Standing Rock. “I didn’t take an oath to defend corporations. I took an oath to defend the people.” I really loved what Christian Fabien had to say about it. And, where the veterans plan to go next is good too. But still, there’s this bullshit, Dakota Access Pipeline to continue despite Army Corps failure to grant easement.

7. Best Christmas ad of the year. “This ad out of Poland — shot in English — tells a moving story…that touches on human truths and deep values, using subtle humor and pathos.”

8. Van Jones: Only a ‘Love Army’ Will Conquer Trump. In related news, Love Deez Nutz, or Why Van Jones Is Wrong and Maybe Even a Bit of a Bullshitting Magical Negro, or Happy Friday from My Corner of Trump’s America–Whatever You Like–I’m Tired.

9. This Is Why We Freeze. “It’s a Sisyphean task. All women are set up to fail, convinced it’s their own fault, and persuaded that all they need to do is keep trying, keep trying, keep trying, because the rewards of looking like you’re the perfect woman are relief from the efforts required to get there. Only, it’s a false fable. No woman has ever gotten ‘there.’” The cake is a lie.

10. Getting Back to Work. But What, Now, is the Work? from Ill Doctrine.

11. Love Notes for America. “In the wake of the 2016 election, mosques and other religious organizations across America have begun receiving anonymous hate mail and have been subjected to vandalism. This website was created to make it easy for all of us to combat this hate mail with love notes. On this site, you will find a list of mosques that have received hate mail (as well as other religious institutions that have been subjected to xenophobia), along with their mailing addresses. The goal is simple: Send a note or a postcard to these organizations to show their members that they are loved and appreciated.”

12. This comic from The Oatmeal illustrates how we’re missing the mark on happiness.

13. Let’s make magic in 2017! Susannah Conway’s (FREE) unravel your year workbook.

14. Food Psych #81: How to Honor Your Body and Feast on Your Life with Rachel Cole.

15. The other person is always right and Two kinds of winning from Seth Godin.

16. Now Is the Time to Stand Up: Practicing the Dharma in Uncertain Times, Part 2 by Jack Kornfield on Lion’s Roar. “Now a time of change has come. We must listen deeply, bear witness, honor everyone, and choose our actions wisely and courageously. Do not worry if the Right Action is not yet clear to you. Wait in the unknowing with mindfulness and a clear heart. Soon the right time will come and you will know to stand up.”

17. S*** Happens: Breaking the Perceptions of Perfection and Control. “In dog training (and in life), shit happens.” Word.

18. Put Your Hands Together, my new favorite podcast. “‘Put Your Hands Together’ is a first-of-its-kind weekly standup podcast. PYHT delivers 75 minutes of jokes and backstage chats with LA’s best and brightest comics directly to your earbuds.”

19. Insecure. I got a 30 day free trial of HBO through my Amazon Prime account just so I could watch this. The show is so good, really great writing, acting, and music.

20. Solange‘s A Seat at the Table. I can’t stop listening to this album. It’s so good.