Gratitude

1. Morning walks. As it is spring, three things are unfortunately true about taking a walk: you have to go out really early to catch the sunrise, this is our rainy season so you also have to closely watch the forecast and many days avoid the dirt (mud) trails, and it’s tick season (we just found the second one in two weeks on Ringo — so gross!). Other than that, they are still one of the best things.

2. Our garden. Just when I thought our irises weren’t going to do as well this year, I noticed an explosion of buds which will lead to so many blooms. All of my peonies are growing inches every day and also promise many flowers. My friend Janice gave us more raspberries plants and one day when they feel comfortable and settled in, we’ll have actual berries. In the next few weeks, we’ll do the real work of cleaning up and planting our vegetable garden. Everything is so green right now with all the rain. It all just makes me so happy.

3. Family group texts. I got added a couple of days ago to one updating everyone about my uncle’s recent hospital stay. My mom’s family had twelve kids and then there are various spouses and kids that have all kept in contact so it’s a lot of people to keep in the loop when something important happens. I didn’t have everyone’s numbers saved in my contacts and a lot of them didn’t have mine so it was hilarious watching us all try to simultaneously take part in the original conversation and figure out who the heck we were talking to. I’ve managed to get all but four of the numbers sorted and saved. I had to learn to not interrupt people as an adult, that not everyone had the same conversation style as my family. I wasn’t being rude (but people took it that way) it’s just that in my family to be able to say anything and be heard, you had to gauge when someone was just about finished and talk over the top of them. If you waited until they were done and quiet, it was too late because someone else would already be talking and you’d lost your chance.

4. Being alone at home. Sometimes I wish I were more social, more adventurous, more extroverted, but I am SO not. And really, at the end of the day, I’m okay with that. 

5. My tiny family, tiny home, tiny life. Four years ago today, when I was working my last week at CSU, I posted this on Facebook: “Went to my CSU office yesterday to bring home my plants and clear out most everything else. It felt so good taking that step. In my own often quiet way I’ve been planning this exit, dreaming of this letting go for almost ten years. I can trace it back to that awful year when both Obi and Kelly were diagnosed with cancer, and that next unbearable year when they both died. I looked at my life then and realized I wasn’t fully living what was true for me and vowed to change that. Mostly what I want to share is that real change often takes a lot of time and effort, and you don’t have to want or have a large, loud life. Having a small life that is wide and deep and quiet and slow is just as valid.” Still so true, maybe even more so.

Bonus joy: the weekend, dark chocolate covered walnuts, taco salad, finding both ticks on Ringo before they had been there long enough to do any damage, listening to podcasts, watching good TV and movies, making Eric laugh, cooking together, crows, other people’s dogs, credit card awards, a massage from Dana, making some progress on cleaning up my office, being able to do what I need for myself, curly hair, texting with my brother and mom, making art with Janice, checking in with Chloe’ and Mikalina and Chelsey, other people’s gardens, redbud trees, peony tulips (I need to get some of these), the farmer’s market, the food truck rally, being able to go to a movie theater again, trying new recipes, sitting in the backyard or on the couch with Eric and Ringo going nothing, reading in bed at night while Eric and Ringo sleep.

Something Good

1. Books I want to read: Soil: The Story of a Black Mother’s Garden, and How to Love the World: Poems of Gratitude and Hope, and Inciting Joy: Essays. I just finished Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow and You Could Make This Place Beautiful and really enjoyed both.

2. My Taste Is Basic. So What? “In an essay from her new book ‘Quietly Hostile,’ author Samantha Irby explains how three simple words can stop judgmental friends in their tracks.”

3. How to be more creative, according to psychology. “From keeping dream diaries to using particular emotional regulation strategies, here’s the research on how to boost creativity, digested.”

4. Depth“Personalized journal prompts to help you understand and navigate how you feel. Powered by AI, built by Reflection.app.” Y’all, I’m still so unsure about how to feel about AI. In related news, Professional human loser and AI as intern from Austin Kleon. Also this, Man Fakes His Entire Life for a Month With Convincing AI-Generated Photos.

5. The Benefits of TikTok’s Latest Really Good Idea, ‘Soft Hiking.’ Or an alternative title for me, “When What You Were Already Doing Becomes A Thing.”

6. Mary Ruefle on the joy of blackout poetry from Austin Kleon. Also from Austin, The thing that sticks out.

7. Keep Going: sustaining a creative practice“Austin Kleon’s little books are packed with wisdom for creatives. Keep Going is about sustaining a creative practice – with kindness and fun.”

8. Rachel W. Cole’s latest newsletter includes a really great question to ask yourself: “If I didn’t need to take any action (maybe if action was prohibited), the hunger I would admit to having is…”

9. 12 Things to Remember When You Are Overwhelmed from Courtney Carver on Be More With Less.

10. The Story of Why I Decided to Become a Mom from Alexandra Franzen. I could write a similar piece about why I decided not to.

11. A Primer on Growth by Gretchen Schmelzer.

12. Maya Angelou on Writing and Our Responsibility to Our Creative Gifts.

13. Fight, Flight, Freeze, & Fawn Response: What’s The Difference?

14. Fresh, Solid, Calm, Free from Kaira Jewel Lingo’s latest newsletter.

15. “Trust Your Experience” from Robert Jones, Jr.

16. How Dare You, America: Bearing witness to the lynching of Jordan Neely in New York City from Frederick Joseph.

17. Patient Quick Guide To Talking About Weight with Healthcare Providers from Ragen Chastain.

18. How to respond to willful ignorance from Patti Digh. “A curated list of possible responses to choose from.”

19. Recipe I want to try: No-Bake Cranberry Oat Energy Bites.

20. The unlikely (but welcome) return of Everything But The Girl.

21. Here’s why you need to be cultivating awe in your life. “Research shows that people recently exposed to awe are kinder, more environmentally friendly, and better connected to others.”

22. Hyper-realistic vegan needle-felted animals by Elizabeth Perez.

23. The Plastic Horse.

24. Sculpture Honoring the Life of Freya the Euthanized Walrus Is Unveiled in Norway.

25. She ripped up her manicured lawn and challenged the norms of gardening stories“In Soil: The Story of a Black Mother’s Garden, Dungy describes her years-long project to transform her weed-filled, water-26. hogging, monochromatic lawn in suburban Fort Collins, Colo., into a pollinator’s paradise, packed instead with vibrant, drought-tolerant native plants.”

26. Making People Uncomfortable Can Now Get You Killed on The New York Times from Roxane Gay.

27. How To Plant A Lemon In A Cup: Make Your Home Smell Fresh And Boost Your Mood.

28. Photographer Documents How People Live in Cramped Rented Rooms in Seoul.

29. Lyrical Illustrations Celebrate the Diversity of Wildlife and the Joy of Observation.

30. Perfectly Drawn Tattoos Look Like Stickers Placed on the Skin.