Category Archives: Three Truths and One Wish

Three Truths and One Wish

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1. Truth: Some issues cannot be solved through abstinence. I offer up myself and my “life-rehab” as a specific example of this.  The difficulties I am currently working with are that I have been in a long term abusive relationship, with myself, and need to learn how to relate to myself differently, to heal that relationship.  Also, as I mentioned just the other day, I have a damaged and distorted relationship with food.  In both cases, I cannot simply abstain.  I can’t abstain from eating or relating to myself. I would die.

by Hugh MacLeod

2. Truth: Difficulties such as these require continued effort and sustained practice. You have to keep trying, keep showing up and doing the work, practice, and even start over when necessary, stay with it, and ask for help. “To stay, you have to believe there is something worth staying for…and then you have to bring yourself back, again and again,” Geneen Roth.

by Hugh MacLeod

3. Truth: Things are workable, and you already have what it will take to succeed. You have basic, innate kindness and wisdom.  You know who you are.

“In Buddhist teachings, as well as in the teachings of many other contemplative or mystical traditions, the basic view is that people are fundamentally good and healthy. It’s as if everyone who has ever been born has the same birthright, which is enormous potential of warm heart and clear mind. The ground of renunciation is realizing that we already have exactly what we need, that what we have already is good. Every moment of time has enormous energy in it, and we could connect with that.” ~Pema Chödrön

by Hugh MacLeod

One wish: I wish you, all of us, the joy that comes with this hard work, of being who we are, of loving who we are, all the messy and stinky and beautiful bits. Our difficulties aren’t something to rush through or get over or past, but rather they are our life, they are living. Despair and even happiness are simply the weather and our basic goodness the sun, always there even when we can’t see it.

“It doesn’t matter how long we may have been stuck in a sense of our limitations. If we go into a darkened room and turn on the light, it doesn’t matter if the room has been dark for a day, a week, or ten thousand years — we turn on the light and it is illuminated. Once we control our capacity for love and happiness, the light has been turned on.” ~Sharon Salzberg

by Hugh MacLeod

  • Okay, it’s your turn. Speak your truths and make a wish.

Three Truths and One Wish

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Truth: Thanksgiving isn’t just about the food. I am guilty of shoveling it in so fast I barely taste it, eating so much that I don’t feel anything but numb–but that’s not what it’s about. It is about being grateful for what you’ve been given, for what you have, saying thank you. Instead of being greedy or grasping or hoarding, honor your good luck and then let it go, share it, give it away. As for what you keep, love it and use it. Say thank you.

Try something like this before you eat your big meal on Thanksgiving Day, “Blessings on our food and all that made it possible: the rain, the sun, the people who grew it, brought it here and prepared it,” (from Women, Food, and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything by Geneen Roth).  Here’s another nice one, a modification of something from the Anglican Church of Canada, “For food in a world where many walk in hunger. For friends in a world where many walk alone. For faith in a world where many walk in fear. We give thanks.” Or, here’s one I’ve heard at Buddhist meditation retreats, “We receive this food in gratitude to all beings who have helped to bring it to our table, and vow to respond in turn to those in need with wisdom and compassion.” Say Grace. Or, if that doesn’t feel right for you, at least say “thank you.”

Truth: Christmas isn’t just about the presents. This is difficult to see right now, what with all the advertising about Black Friday. And yet, most of us don’t really need anymore stuff, as kindly and lovingly as it might be offered. As for the gifts we give, we need to question our motives, more insistently and often than we do. Is the gift a substitute for our time, our kindness, our presence, our open-heart? Am I trying to earn love and appreciation? And why now, exactly? Because I think I am supposed to?

Instead of Black Friday and shopping and the list of everything we think we are supposed to do, think about this: “Here’s to a refrigerator full of food. Here’s to the electricity that runs that refrigerator. Here’s to clean water being a flick of the faucet away. Here’s to going to bed tonight with a roof over my head (and without the fear of a bomb crashing through it). Here’s to the knowledge that when I dial 911 an ambulance will come get me, not a man with a wheelbarrow…And here’s to remembering those of us who aren’t so lucky. And to do our part to share our good fortune in whatever ways we can,” (from “The Thanksgiving Project – Giving Thanks for the Big Things” by Josh Martin).

You know what my favorite thing about Christmas was as a kid? It wasn’t the presents, even though it felt like they were really important. It was turning the tree lights on when it was dark outside and turning off all the other lights, and putting on Elvis Presley’s “Blue Christmas” album, and cuddling with my mom on the couch. Not the presents. Not even close.

Truth: This is the season of rest, gratitude, generosity, love, and joy. It is supposed to be simple, although we have complicated it with all of our expectations and demands. This year, instead: Do less, love more. Buy less, give more. Bark less, wag more. Stop doing so much and just be. Read Courtney Putnam’s latest blog post, “Doing and Being.” It will help.

I wish for all beings a season of abundance and appreciation–not the kind you can buy at the store or order online, but rather real, honest, and open-hearted.

  • What are you wishing for this season?