Category Archives: Core Values

Something Good.

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It’s Monday, so it’s time for me to tell you something good.

Just a cute baby owl. That is all.

Friday Birthdays.  When your birthday is on a Friday, like mine was this year, there’s a universal rule that you get to celebrate the whole weekend. On Friday, a good friend took me to lunch, gave me a sweet gift (two actually, one was wrapped and the other was her telling me the nicest thing I’d ever done for her and how much it meant), lots of birthday wishes on Facebook (one of the top five reasons to have an account), one sweet email wishing me love and thanking me for a gift I had given that was “life-changing,” a present and phone call from my mom, and more presents from my aunt and boy (Eric made me a book with a secret compartment, so cool!).

Then on Saturday, another good friend took me to lunch and gave me a handmade gift (she’s an amazing artist, so even her cards are something special), and a phone call from my brother and another good friend.  Sunday morning, we found that the mail had been delivered late in the evening, so there was a package from my brother and nieces, and another card from a good friend who always says the nicest things, Sunday morning yoga, and lunch at Mount Everest Cafe, where our favorite waiter didn’t even ask us what we wanted to start, he simply brought us out a chai and a glass of Fat Tire as soon as we sat down.  It was an awesome birthday weekend.

Picture by Philip Bragg

Shantideva Quote: “If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying?”

The Open Heart Project. I have a confession to make.  I have been struggling with my meditation practice lately.  Then I read about Susan Piver’s Open Heart Project on Jennifer Louden’s blog.  Susan Piver is a student of the Shambhala tradition, which is also where my meditation practice started, so to begin, she comes from a place I understand. She’s shared a series of videos, meditation instruction and guided meditations anywhere from 5 to 40 minutes.  Using these videos to focus my own practice has been so helpful.

Wishcasting Wednesday. This is something started by creative living coach and blogger, Jamie Ridler. She explains it this way: “What would happen if every week you made a wish? What magic might start to stir? Wishcasting Wednesday is a safe haven for wishes, a fertile field in which to plant wish seeds and have them witnessed and tended lovingly. It’s a place where magic begins.”  I am going to add this feature to my Wednesday blog posts.

A New Post from Hyperbole and a Half. This is actually more than a month old now, but I somehow had missed it.  I had thought/worried about Allie on and off over the past few months.  She’d posted she was working on a book, but then disappeared, and knowing what I know about freaking out and freezing up even/especially in the face of something big and good, I wondered if she might be in trouble. Her latest post is called “Adventures in Depression,” and as always, it is heartbreaking, true, and funny.  Sometimes I wonder if she realizes how brave and wonderful she really is.

Rachel W. Cole, and her list of suggested reading. I am so excited about her coming out to Fort Collins to do a Well-Fed Woman Mini-Retreatshop, (Sunday, February 19th, 12:30-3:30 at Om Ananda Yoga Studio–more details to come soon). On her website, Rachel shares her list of “11 Books that Changed My Life,” and you can also link to her much longer, full list of recommendations.  I am starting with “Women, Food, and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything” by Geneen Roth.

And finally, links to a few very special, sweet videos.

*”Being Elmo” Movie Trailer

*”Lily Shreds Trailside.” I can’t decide if I like this so much because there’s a dog and she’s so cute, or because it’s just such a cool video.

*Marcel the Shell with Shoes On


  • Okay, now it’s your turn: Tell me something good.

Stop Waiting. Just Start.

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I was stuck for a long time. Essentially, I had writer’s block for at least 20 years.  I was waiting for someone else to judge that I was good enough and give me permission to start. I waited for a fully formed great idea to come before I could start. And when I did have ideas, if I discovered that someone else had already done something similar, I’d give up on it. I had to earn it, be good enough, prove myself, get permission, and have a really great and totally original idea first, before I could start, so I just kept waiting.

Image from Free FotoI have since realized, not in a single flash of understanding but through a lot of hard work and excavation, that the only thing getting in the way of me having the life I wanted, doing the work I wanted, being an artist, was me. I could give myself permission, get out of my own way and simply start.

I can only know what the project will be by starting it and being fully present and mindful as I work. This became clear as I was working on my heART Exchange art swap project, because that’s the way it happened. At first, I had plans to paint something. I recently took a painting class with a group of friends, and I liked it so much, I bought some canvas, brushes and paints. I’m not very good, but given enough time and patience, I’m not horrible.

But somehow I got confused about how the process of the art swap would work, and got it in my head that I’d have plenty of time to start after I got my partner’s name and address, so I waited (this always gets me in trouble). When I got the name, I realized I only had five days to make something before I had to mail it, and I was working four of those days. I would never have enough time to paint something, and it would be a stressful experience, not a creative work filled with love and joy. I had to think of another idea.

I looked around my studio (I just made the decision to call it that, to admit that this space I work in is no longer an office, it’s an art studio) to see what I might make. I remembered the fabric I had left over from when we made Kelly a quilt, (here’s the blog about the process). Here’s the square I made:

The leftover fabric is special, can’t be used for just anything, so I thought about what I might make with it for my art swap.  I got an idea, and that idea evolved into something completely different as I worked on it, (I’ll post more about the project once my swap partner receives it).  I made myself stay with each step of the process: stitch all the gold thread designs before stitching the silver, sew all the buttons on before writing the words, etc.  There were five similar pieces in the project and instead of finishing one completely, to check and make sure it would “work,” instead of rushing and pushing and judging, I stayed with each step, fully embodying that part of the process, understanding and finishing it before moving on, instead of jumping around in fits and starts, and resting when I got tired.

In this way, the magic of the process manifested a finish project I could have never predicted if I had tried to decide it before I began.  Here’s a sneak peek:

So I have learned that you have to simply start, and be mindful and present as you work.  I have also realized that I am a messy artist. I used to assume that meant I didn’t know what I was doing, because “shouldn’t I be in control of the process, know what is happening, direct it?” But no, I just do the thing right now that feels like it needs doing, should be done, is right without needing a clear reason or plan.  I do that for a long time, one step at a time, step after step, and at some point the whole becomes clear, comes into focus, and it makes sense what I’ve been doing and how it will work and what it might mean.  This awareness often happens just before the project is finished.  Not until it’s fully formed and done do I understand what I’ve been working on.

I explained this to my friend yesterday and she said “that takes a lot of faith.”  Yeah.  To trust it will work out, make sense eventually, and that you just need to keep moving, working through that unknown territory without a map or any instructions, trusting your gut and your intuition and the process.  In that way, it’s so much more about the act of creating than the creation, the product.  To make art is to be in it, embody the process, life evolving as part of the practice.

I am not one of the lucky ones who can make a plan, outline the steps ahead of time.  I have to show up every day and do the work, be the work, and trust that it will all lead somewhere, and even if it doesn’t, being present for the doing, the mindful creating, is what ultimately matters.  Because, in the end, I am not only making art, I am making a life.

  • What are you making?