Author Archives: jillsalahub

Unknown's avatar

About jillsalahub

Writer & Contemplative Practice Guide holding space for people cultivating a foundation of a stable mind, embodied compassion and wisdom. CYT 500

Something Good

Leave a reply

1. Wisdom from Zora Neale Hurston, “Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place.”

2. The Birthday Experiment That Changed Everything. I love this idea, and the secret is: you don’t have to wait until your birthday to do it.

3. The Diet And Beauty Industries’ Cycle Of Disempowerment from Dances with Fat. In related news, Comebacks To Shut Down Fatphobia – Part Four.

4. Health At Every Size (HAES): A Guide for Binge Eating Recovery. I’ve posted this before, but it’s always worth another read, especially if you don’t know much about HAES.

5. This Naked Mind EP 145: Stop Fighting Food with Isabel Foxen Duke, a podcast.

6. The Original Renegade on The New York Times. “A 14-year-old in Atlanta created one of the biggest dances on the internet. But nobody really knows that.”

7. Kelly Link’s Advice to Debut Authors: Writing is Terrible, Complaining About it Is Fine, “From Her 2019 Speech at the One Story Debutante Ball.”

8. Father Of Two With No Arms Or Legs, (video). “Ryan was told he would never drive a car, go to a regular school or even have a family – but he’s proved all of the doubters wrong.”

9. Two Detroit artists on how they use painting, photography to capture complexity of black life.

10. Sam Smith – To Die For (Official Video).

11. Comedian Maria Bamford tried to get a restraining order against Donald Trump.

12. Recipes I want to try: Soft Ginger Cookie, and Sweet Potato-Black Bean Burgers, and Split Pea Soup.

13. “My son’s best friend moved to Jacksonville about 4 years ago. They’ve only gotten to see each other 3 times since then, but have continued to FaceTime all the time for hours. We planned to surprise them in Disney this year, and as you can see they both got emotional. They even had people around them crying.” (video)

14. “Fall On Me” by A Great Big World and PS22 Chorus. (video) “This Valentine’s Day season was made extra special with a visit from our friends Chad & Ian of A Great Big World! Now we’ve sung quite a few songs with these gentlemen over the years, but this rendition of their new single #FallOnMe with Christina Aguilera is almost certainly the pièce de résistance!!!”

15. The Intimate Act of Performing Pain. “There’s an acute and near-indescribable vulnerability that comes with admitting to being in pain in real time.”

16. How Did Louis C.K. Get Away With It For So Long? “Anatomy of a Toxic Power Dynamic.”

17. Best friends, always. (video) “A year and a half ago, Steve Hartman introduced us to a pair of unlikely best friends: widower Dan Peterson and Norah Wood, a little girl who encountered him in a grocery store and demanded a hug. He gave her one, and they’ve been inseparable every since, including at Norah’s recent pre-school graduation in Augusta, Georgia.” Sadly, Dan Peterson recently died. May we all be so loved at the end, (and the beginning and middle).

18. Confirmed: Sex Education is coming back for season three. In related news, “Sex Education” Renewed for Season 3 at Netflix. Yay!

19. 30 of the Best Books by Black Authors You Should Read in Your Lifetime.

20. How Unhealed Trauma Affects Highly Sensitive People. “My emotional reactivity, anxiety, and shame weren’t only about being an HSP — it also had to do with unhealed trauma.”

21. Black teen suspended for not cutting dreadlocks attends Oscars with makers of ‘Hair Love’ film.

22. 10 Requests from a Fat Patient to Her Health Care Providers. “In the midst of an ‘Obesity Epidemic,’ fat patients are getting worse healthcare than ever. Here are some things providers can do to help.”

23. The Privilege of Rage, about the ways white women continue to colonize and appropriate the work of people of color, Black women in particular.

24. Paraic O’Donnell: MS is meticulously destroying me. I am being unmade. This is one of the most beautiful, elegant essays about a horrible, awful thing.

Day of Rest: Burnout Recovery

2 Replies

The door to nowhere…

I’m categorizing this post as a “Day of Rest” because that’s usually what I post, if I post, on a Sunday. To be fair, it could also be a Life Rehab Resources, or What I Learned, or What I’m Doing. I’m realizing that after nine months of taking care of myself and trying to be patient, that if I was 100% burnt out nine months ago, I’m still about 87% burnt out now, and I should maybe be taking a more direct approach (instead of trying to “wait it out”), which for me typically starts with some deep research and contemplation.

I posted on Facebook and Instagram asking for books that had helped people through recovery from burnout, even if it wasn’t specifically about burnout. Some of the suggestions were:

One person on Facebook asked for clarification about the cause of my burnout, as that might help her make a more effective recommendation. As I told her, and I think have said here before, “the reasons are compound: just retired after 19 years in a stressful job, on year 11 of perimenopause, an autoimmune disorder, complex-PTSD, etc. So pretty much pick a reason and I’ve probably got it.” That makes deciding on a direct approach for recovery so much more complicated.

What’s been working for me so far, in terms of practices and support: Therapy, quitting my job, reading, watching lots of TV and taking lots of naps, eating what I want when I want it as much as I want, aqua aerobics, yoga, meditation, massage, having honest conversations with those close to me, asking for what I need, walking and napping and cuddling with my dogs, my infrared heating pad, our new living room furniture, flowers in the bathroom, cleaning out my office, getting more plants, limiting the amount of time I spend “peopling,” listening to music and podcasts, comedy, sitting in the sauna, reading in bed at night while Eric and the dogs are asleep, really good healthcare for my dogs (the better care they get, the less stressed I feel), writing, turning down the volume on bad news, cute animal and baby and dance videos, art, CBD oil, a small dose of THC before bed to help me sleep, the softest pjs in the world, my moon lamp, my HappyLight, and a sunrise alarm clock.

Another thing I have to do is cultivate patience and a willingness (which is currently reluctant) to accept that this could be permanent. I may never have more energy than I have right now and I need to figure out how to be okay with that.

All that said, I have a favor to ask you, kind and gentle reader: if you have recovered from burnout, what worked for you? What did you try, read, watch, do to feel better? If you don’t mind, could you post a comment or send me an email (lifewholehearted@gmail.com) and let me know? One request: as I am in recovery for not one but three eating disorders, even if a diet or nutritional supplement worked for you, could you leave that part out? I have to be super careful about how I handle anything having to do with nourishing myself through food or supplements, so not referencing anything related to that would be really helpful to me. Thank you in advance. You are the best!