1. Signs of spring, especially the blooms. I am really missing having flowers in my bathroom, (but not enough to risk going in to the store to buy some). Soon I’ll be able to bring some in from my own garden. I’m especially looking forward to the lilacs and peonies and the tall spikes of white irises with yellow tongues that my friend Ann gifted me the year before she died.
2. Things I miss. The gratitude isn’t about not having them or the sense of sad longing I feel when I think about them, but rather the clarity that comes with being so certain how much you love something, to know without a doubt what matters. On the top of my list is my yoga students, group yoga classes, the pool and sauna at my gym, hugging my friends, seeing my family “in person”, my friend’s dogs, massages from Dana, haircuts, going out to eat, seeing a movie in the theater with popcorn and soda pop, grocery shopping, (in particular being able to go in without fear, find and buy anything you want, which leads to eating what I want not just what I have).
3. Practice. I’ve always been someone who does much better with a routine, something to ground me and give my days structure. It’s probably related to being a highly sensitive introvert. I like at least some things to be predictable, the same, dependable, to give me a sense of structure and stability amidst the confusion, chaos, and change that is life. This has never been truer than now, and I’m so grateful that every day there are at least a few things that will repeat, stay the same.
4. I’m still here, still healthy and safe. It’s never a guarantee and I’m grateful.
5. Morning walks. Most days when I go now, it’s all four of us, and I am not mad about that.
6. My tiny family. As hard as this moment is, it could be so much harder without these three. If I have to stay home all the time, if I’m scared or sad, there’s no one I’d rather be with.
Bonus joy: the internet, video chatting with Mikalina and Chloe’, good TV, good books, good podcasts, comedians, naps, a warm shower, doing yoga and HIIT workouts with Eric, sitting in the backyard in the sun, cuddling with the dogs, hugs from Eric, the way he asks me “what can I do for you?”, texting with my brother and mom, breakfast for dinner, the new skillet Eric bought, marionberry jam, laughing.