Gratitude Friday

PicMonkeyPumkinCollage1. Fall. How fat the squirrels are getting eating goodies from our compost pile and our pumpkins (see the above before and after shots for proof), the little girls from down the street who knocked on our door and told me they liked our pumpkins and took a few home with them even though they were the last ones left and total Charlie Brown Christmas tree pumpkins, how Eric left a bunch of them at the end of the driveway with a sign “take a pumpkin” expecting a few to be gone when he got back from hiking with the dogs only to be surprised to see them all gone, the cooler weather, down blankets, wool socks.

2. Skyping with friends. Technology makes it possible for me to hang out with people who live in a whole other time zone the same as if we were sitting at my kitchen table. It’s magic, and it’s medicine.

3. Roasted Butternut Squash with olive oil, a ton of garlic, and a bit of sea salt. So good.

butternutsquash

4. Making stuff, like a writing class for Inky Path, another Wild Writing Crazy Wisdom workshop as well as a shorter version without the yoga, blogging, Wild Writing, taking pictures, art journaling, collaging, cooking.

5. Sweet Sam and Ringo Blue. We are in the sweet spot with these two right now — no one is a baby and no one is dying, no one is sick or hurt. Since it’s fall, Eric has been hiking with them a lot again, so when they are home they are so tired they just lounge around. Such good boys.
eaglesnesttraillazycouchingBonus joy: new music which means I’m making myself a new playlist, flowers from Eric because “they were pretty and I knew you’d like them,” teaching yoga, reading Big Magic, documentaries about musicians (I watched one about Paul Williams and another about Glen Campbell and want to watch the one about Amy Winehouse this weekend), birds still feeding on our sunflowers which are so wilted and dead you’d think there was nothing left to them, a podcast of my favorite morning radio show without commercials or music, trusting myself.

Three Truths and One Wish

balancehorsetooth

image by Eric

1. Truth: My theme in my yoga classes lately has been “balance.” Specifically what balance isn’t. We often are confused about what it means to find balance, think of it as a fixed point, a place we can get to where we’ll be happy and safe, a place where we can stay. But balance is actually about awareness. Because the conditions of our experience are constantly in flux, changing and shifting, finding balance is really about cultivating an awareness of what is arising and being able to adjust and adapt. The energy of our emotional and physical bodies changes, sometimes as quickly as from one breath to the next. Our health and environment changes, culture and our communities are living things constantly evolving, and the people around us contribute their own shifts. Nothing stays the same, there is no fixed reality. As soon as we find a still point, something comes along to upset it. So balance isn’t about a stable place, but rather about becoming a stable person amidst the chaos and change.

2. Truth: Balance can be hard to find when so many bad things are happening. My health has been a struggle recently which leads to frustration and disappointment. Last night I found out someone I know not only has breast cancer, but got pneumonia and went to the hospital, where she had a heart attack! Other friends are letting go of their sweet dog today, which breaks my heart because I also love her. Another friend has not one but two sick dogs. I could widen the circle to people I don’t know, to world events, and the list would quickly become overwhelming.

3. Truth: Even though it’s complicated and hard, balance is a worthy pursuit. It seems a little crazy, considering the point of balance is constantly shifting, and that you’ll never be able to stop your effort, but what’s the alternative? I’d rather keep trying, stumble and get back up, even if the steadiness and stability I manage doesn’t last. I know from experience that the longer I work at it, the stronger I get — it’s harder to knock me down and I get up much quicker. I’m not indestructible, I’m vulnerable, but I’m not giving up.

One wish: That whatever knocks us down isn’t so big we decide to stay down, that no matter what happens we are able to get back up, that we ask for help if it seems like too much, and that no matter what we never give up. Along with that, a little sweetness wouldn’t hurt. ❤