Category Archives: Open Heart

Day of Rest

It’s not about letting go of worry or getting over fear.

It’s about letting go of the idea that you can control everything, or anything.

It’s about making space for uncertainty and doubt.

It’s about surrendering to impermanence and getting past resistance to change.

It’s about “having the life you want by being present to the life you have,” (the subtitle to Mark Nepo’s The Book of Awakening).

It’s about confidence, “the willingness to be as ridiculous, luminous, intelligent, and kind as you really are, without embarrassment,” (the brilliant Susan Piver said that).

It’s about paying attention, being mindful and present.

It’s about letting go of both hope and fear.

It’s about having faith in basic goodness, our innate and fundamental and natural wisdom and compassion, our essential and shared humanity.

It’s about risking heartbreak and failure, knowing that it’s so much better than being numb.

It’s about living a wholehearted life–“engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging,” (from Brene’ Brown’s new book, Daring Greatly).

It’s about refusing to smash yourself to bits, and not being afraid of yourself.

It’s about choosing vulnerability over safety and predictability, letting go of the longing for solid ground, for a life of nothing but happiness and security.

It’s about love.

It’s about having the courage to face your own life, show up, keep your heart open, and allow yourself to be seen.

It’s about being brave.

a winnebago parked in my neighborhood, the brave model

Who’s with me?

Three Truths and One Wish

1. Truth: Trying to be anyone other than who I am won’t make me happy. In some cases, comparison kills–my creativity, my sense of self-worth, my well-being, my sense of direction. To imagine I’d be happier or more loved if I just had that hair or her thighs or drove that car or lived in that house or had that job or lost 20 pounds (again) is a delusion. Nothing I don’t have, nothing I’m not will make me happy if I’m unable to be happy with what already is, as it is right now.

2. Truth: Perfectionism is a form of self-aggression. Trying to be someone I’m not won’t work, but attempting to become a perfect version of myself is just as dangerous. Perfection doesn’t exist, isn’t possible, and isn’t even preferable. Think about it: do you love the people you love because of what they get right (her hair is always perfect, her wardrobe stunning, her house spotless) or for their flaws (how she’s always tripping over everything, his crazy cowlick, how easily she cries, how he can never find his wallet, the way she snorts when she laughs really hard)?

3. Truth: The best I, the best any of us have to offer is exactly who we are, in this very moment. Crazy, confused, uncool freaks. And totally badass. Every one of us a precious, brilliant, stinky mess.

One Wish: That we show up with an open heart, completely and utterly in the moment as we are, fully accepting and embodying this moment, this self. That we are able to relax, be gentle, and let go.