Gratitude Friday

1. It’s Eric and I’s 28th anniversary! That seems like a really really long time at the same time that it totally doesn’t. The day to day living of it seems like we’ve just started until I start to think of all the things we’ve experienced in those years…and it’s A LOT. There is no one that I’d rather do this hard, beautiful, amazing being human thing with than him. He’s my favorite.

2. A like minded nutritionist. There’s some things I want to work on in terms of my wellbeing that are related to food, but when you have a history of disordered eating, the world of health and nutrition is fraught with so much nonsense related to diet culture and fatphobia that it’s confusing, risky, even dangerous. Finding someone with a HAES, ED centered practice is such a relief.

3. Practice. I am particularly grateful for meditation, the way it allows me to be with what’s hard with wisdom and compassion.

4. Morning walks. I’d say that this week and next we are at peak autumn. Everything is lit up and glowing gold. Fall is my favorite time of year and this one isn’t disappointing.

5. My tiny family, my tiny house, my tiny life. At lunch today, I asked Eric if there was anything he’d do differently with the last 30 years of his life. The only thing he could come up with is to buy a more expensive house 20 years ago, because we could have and property values here have more than doubled in that time. Then I asked him if he thought we’d be happier with a bigger, more expensive house, and he said, “no.” That was all he could think of, and the only thing I had was to not bring up something that about seven years ago caused a fight between us that felt like it lasted for two years, although even that I told him “maybe needed to happen.” I feel super lucky and grateful that we have the life we have, that we’ve been able to live so much of it together, and that we still choose each other.

Bonus joy: Golden leaves falling like snow, raspberries, crunchy apples, podcasts, clean laundry, clean sheets, flowers in the bathroom, crunchy peanut butter, food Ringo can eat that he’s not allergic to, cooler weather, making art and hanging out with Calyx, texting with Mom and Chris, baby pictures from Chloe’, cooking, good TV, napping, getting in the pool, sitting in the sauna (but not the dude who told me “you have a beautiful smile” while we were in there alone), laughing with Eric, reading in bed while Ringo and Eric sleep.

1. Fall color. This time of year, everything is changing so fast. We walk somewhere and just a day or two later we go back and it looks so different.

2. Morning walks. I love the cooler weather, the shift to more quiet. So many people go back inside in the fall and winter, especially in the morning, and it sometimes feels like we have the whole world to ourselves. We got rained on one morning this week, but it was really warm and we saw a rainbow.

3. Science. We got results back for allergy tests we did on Ringo, in part because of his wonky belly. Turns out he’s allergic to corn, flax, milk, oats, peas, pumpkin, rice, and spinach. He’s been getting pumpkin and rice every meal! He’s also allergic to all kinds of grasses and cottonwoods! And the kind of yeast that can cause ear infections, which explains the trouble he’s had with his ears. So I dropped some serious cash at the feed store because pretty much every food and treat we have for him has something he can’t have. I’m so grateful we had access to the test, the money to pay for it, and a care team who loves him so much. So handsome, so high maintenance.

4. So many tomatoes! I went out yesterday and picked as many as I could, as we are in that part of the year when the real cold could come any time. This weekend I’ll be making roasted tomato soup and tomato jam.

5. My tiny family, tiny home, tiny life. I am looking forward to sinking in to all three this weekend.

Bonus joy: Drawing and hanging out with Calyx, lunch with Carrie, texting with Chloe’ (especially now that she can send me pictures of her cute baby) and Mom and Chris, meeting with my new nutritionist (she’s both HAES and ED centered — if you know, you know), good TV, listening to podcasts, getting in the pool, sitting in the sauna, cooking with Eric, laughing with Eric, being cold, a big glass of cold clean water, cancelled plans, clean laundry, pay day, paying all our bills, clean sheets, taco salad, vaccines, reading in bed at night while Ringo and Eric sleep.