1. Morning walks. Eric and I decided that we liked going together so much, we are going to make more of an effort to do that at least once a week. And as nice as it is to have dry trails and therefore be able to walk anywhere we want, we desperately need snow and colder temperatures right now. Without it, our lawn is still green and my irises are starting to come up, and that is just wrong.

2. Other people’s kids and dogs. Hendrix with his new baby cousin, the way they look at each other and how big Hendrix smiles at him. And Tony, now five months old, who I am somehow able to leave without every time I go visit him — that’s some serious self-control right there.

3. Good humans. Making art with Janice, going to brunch with Carrie, texting with Chloe’, sending love to Kari, New Year’s Day yoga with Sarada, laughing with Dana, writing with my Friday morning Wild-ish Writing sangha, (or as Cynthia misnamed it this week: “wildest” writing), training with Shelby and the gang, hopping around in the pool with the aqua aerobics crew.

4. Good books. There aren’t many things I love more than reading. I just started The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery and it’s already blowing my mind, breaking my heart (in a good way), and I’m about to start Yellowface which was on just about every “Best of 2023” book list.

5. My tiny family, small house, little life. This week was a rough one for me, (grief has its own timeline, its own methods), and having Eric and Ringo along with a safe, comfortable place to be makes all the difference.

Bonus joy: twinkle lights, clean laundry, clean sheets (I just put on the flannel ones, fingers crossed they aren’t too warm), grocery shopping at 6:30 am and having the whole entire produce section all to myself and be finally able to take the time to ask how to use the digital coupons, dark chocolate covered almonds, the stack of new books I got for Christmas, a warm shower, tuna fish sandwiches with sweet pickles and tomatoes, my infrared heating pad, the opportunity to start over, sitting in the sauna with Eric, using the hydromassage chair and getting in the pool, peanut butter, green tea, being able to schedule appointments or ask questions on my own schedule using an app rather than having to make a phone call, practice, pain medication, gummies, the sound of our furnace running, naps, blackout curtains and white noise machines, reading in bed at night while Eric and Ringo sleep.  

1. A quiet, cozy Christmas. It was just what I needed this time around. We took some pictures, opened presents, ate good food, napped, texted with family and friends, and watched “A Charlie Brown Christmas.”

2. Morning walks. Since Eric is on break, he’s been going with Ringo and I on our days. It can be hard for him because we don’t run so he gets pretty cold. On today’s walk, there was a lot of jogging in place and dropping and doing push ups to stay warm. On another walk, Eric and I were talking too much, which made Ringo feel like he wasn’t getting enough attention so there was a lot of thrashing the leash, which is his way of filing a complaint on a walk. This morning, we found a labyrinth someone had made next to the river. Ringo didn’t understand how it worked.

3. Practicing yoga at Red Sage. I wish more of the humans who work there had time to come on a more regular basis, but the “regulars” I have are super fun. One told me yesterday that, “I don’t even like yoga, but I come because I like the way you teach it.”

I recommended a “new year’s resolution” to them at the beginning of our last class, whether they are the kind of person who makes them or not, and I’d like to share it with you, kind and gentle reader: “be a better friend to yourself.” No matter what other goals you set or wishes you make, I’m pretty sure if you start from that place, you are WAY more likely to get what you need, to get you where you want to go (or stay).

4. Rest. Instead of beating myself up for all the things, I’m giving myself permission to slow down. This morning, I was reading some of Shelby Forsythia’s book “Your Grief, Your Way,” and she said, “Take a deep breath and remember that you have just lived through one of life’s hardest and most devastating experiences, the death of a loved one. You cannot be who you were, at least not right away. Start by surviving, then shift your focus to thriving.” 

5. My tiny family, small house, little life. I love it here.

Bonus joy: leftovers, those garlic biscuits Eric has been making, aqua aerobics, sitting in the sauna with Eric, so many new books, listening to podcasts, clean sheets, a warm shower, my infrared heating pad, the purple iris stained glass panel Eric got me for Christmas, the purple mums he brought home for me from the grocery store, purple, dark chocolate covered almonds, the coconut bonbons Eric made using my grandma’s recipe, the tiny tarts his mom made and sent us, texting with Chris and Mom and Chloe’, that Instagram reel of the wolves sleeping in the snow, crows, the sound of our furnace, a soft baggy hoodie, down pillows and blankets and coats, writing in front of my HappyLight in the morning with a cup of tea and a snack, cousins, twinkle lights, the chance to start over again, reading in bed at night while Eric and Ringo sleep.