Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

1. Healing. I don’t want to jinx it, but my heel seems to be getting better — with rest, physical therapy, strengthening and stretching exercises, and patience (which was probably the hardest of all), it’s on the mend.

2. The return of kitchen counter love notes. It’s the best thing about going back to work after summer vacation.

3. Our garden. The pumpkins are turning orange, the basil has gone to flower, and even though we only got a few Rocky Mountain Bee Plants this year they are big enough to be feeding many many bees.

4. Good food. Black bean and zucchini pancakes smothered in avocado and tomatoes from our garden, peach pie, glazed lemon zucchini bread, homemade pizza, roasted tomato soup, smoked salmon and cream cheese with spinach on an asiago bagel, corn on the cob, and watermelon.

5. Sweet Sam and Ringo Blue. The morning I took this picture, Eric was hoping to get some work done at home, but the dogs wouldn’t settle down, even though he just took them on a run. They were playing and playing and being rowdy and finally he gave up and went to his office on campus to work. I told him, “you know as soon as you leave, they are going to settle down.” I texted him this picture five minutes after he left.

Bonus joy: the sunflowers in our garden, a good yoga class, Hulu with no commercials, the Your Career Homecoming challenge, giving love and having it find its way back to me, Wild Writing class, more zucchini when I thought it was done producing, figuring out new ways to move, pants that fit and are comfortable, pay day, saying no, knowing what I want, uninterrupted sleep, crock pot meals, an hour working on my book, trusting that I don’t have to know how it’s going to turn out in order to keep going.

1. Truth: I’ve been busy. Taking part in the Your Career Homecoming challenge with Laura Simms, meetings, doctor and physical therapy appointments, teaching, more meetings, working towards our bathroom remodel in various ways, trying to decide when and how to buy a new car, laundry, cooking, taking care of two active dogs, trying to rest and heal but also keep moving, researching how to heal better and faster, considering how I want to move, reading, writing, working, practicing, living. There’s never enough time or energy for all of it.

2. Truth: I’m busy because I take on too much. I want to do ALL THE THINGS. All of it matters to me, is interesting and meaningful and worthwhile. The problem is that my brain and my body are running on two different speeds — my brain says “hurry up!” and my body says “slow down,” and the pattern in the past has been to ignore my body until it collapses.

3. Truth: I’m getting better about taking care of my body, listening and giving it what it needs, choosing how to spend my time and energy more intentionally and wisely, knowing my limitations and respecting them, but there’s still work to been done in this regard, (see how I can turn even slowing down into a project?).

One wish: May we all find a balance between our longing and our limits, and may that space be the happiest of mediums, the clearest middle path.