1. Truth: I’m practicing “like my hair is on fire.” This is a phrase that is used in Buddhism to talk about the mix of a sense of urgency and the confidence to not lapse into despair. I think about it a lot, considering our current “situation.” I’m finishing up 37 Days of Activism, and just started Hard Conversations: An Introduction to Racism and Healing from Toxic Whiteness, all really great online courses. Today I’m doing Safe Zone training through the Pride Center at CSU. I started a group called the Hen House Collective to have some company during this process, to help me filter through all the information and figure out what actions to take. I meditate and write every morning, and do yoga when I can. My hair is on fire.

2. Truth: I’m trying to also take care of myself. I’m trying to keep my sense of humor, get enough rest, eat good food, not get overwhelmed or burn out. In fact, I vow to not burn out:

Aware of suffering and injustice, I, Jill Salahub, am working to create a more just, peaceful, and sustainable world. I promise, for the benefit of all, to practice self-care, mindfulness, healing, and joy. I vow to not burn out.

3. Truth: I am staying curious. “Not knowing is a prerequisite for learning,” (Patti Digh). I am trying to listen, deeply and compassionately, without an agenda and without judgement. As Pema Chödrön said, “The only reason we don’t open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don’t feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with.” I remind myself that being uncomfortable isn’t a bad thing, and try to lean in to that, stay open.

(More than) One Wish: May we stay curious and open, listen deeply and compassionately, not giving in to despair, and maintain our sense of humor even as it seems like the worst is happening. May we also have the discernment to know right action, and be brave enough to take it when necessary. May we continue to be courageous, having the willingness to be wounded, and confident in the way Susan Piver describes it, “the willingness to be as ridiculous, luminous, intelligent, and kind as you really are, without embarrassment.”

1. Truth: Change takes time, patience, effort. Whenever I get frustrated about how long something is taking, I remember that it can be like turning a cruise ship around — just because you know you are going in the wrong direction and need to turn around doesn’t mean it can happen right away, doesn’t mean you can manifest the shift as soon as you are aware of the need. It can take a lot of time to course correct, and if you try to go too fast, try to push it or force it or speed it up, you can sink the boat altogether. (But even though this is true, you don’t give up, you keep turning even though it looks to everyone else like you aren’t moving at all).

2. Truth: A good yoga class first thing in the morning is the best. Having breakfast with a friend you don’t get to see much right after is even better. A long voice message from a friend or a good podcast can make working out at the gym so much more fun, make it easier to stay a few extra minutes, do just one more thing. Getting enough sleep, eating good food, and drinking enough water can make all the difference. Cuddling with a dog keeps you warm in more ways than just one. Reading is the best, both the question and the answer. Knowing someone loves you, that you matter, can be the one thing that keeps you from giving up. Laughing and crying feel a lot alike. These things are all related, both magic and medicine.

3. Truth: Community, compassion, creativity, and a sense of humor are foundational. I’m absolutely counting on them to get me through.

One Wish: That you, kind and gentle reader, know you are an angel of the get through.

Every good heart has lost its roof.
Let all the walls collapse at your feet,
Scream timber when they ask you how you are.
Fine is the suckiest word. It is the opposite of HERE
Here is the only place left on the map
Here is where you learn laughter can go extinct
and come back