Tag Archives: Jamie Ridler

Wishcasting Wednesday

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homeskyFor today’s wishcast, Jamie asks, “What risk do you wish to take?” I am immediately reminded of one of my favorite quotes, from Muriel Rukeyser,

What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life? The world would split open.

I wish to risk telling the truth. Telling my story even though it’s often embarrassing and messy and hard, leaning in and letting go, loving myself, being my own best friend, “willing to be stone stupid,” showing up not knowing and unprepared, keeping my heart open, raw and tender, being vulnerable, willing to be wounded.

The truth today is that I am taking another sick day, and as soon as I finish this I will lie down and maybe stay like that the rest of the day, still tired and achy, tender and sad, feeling like I am right at my edge but finally willing to stop, be still, take care of myself, no matter what anyone else might think about that, even as I am working with feeling guilty, a sharp shame surrounding my suffering, my need to rest, that even though it’s my 20th wedding anniversary today a part of me still wonders “does he love me?” and needs to be reassured.

Wishcasting Wednesday

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image from Jamie, posted on Instagram

image from Jamie, posted on Instagram, a quote from Susan

Jamie asks on this Wishcasting Wednesday, “What do you wish to clear?” She used another image for her post today, but I love this one that she shared on Instagram so much, I’m using it instead. It combines four of my favorite things: Jamie, Susan, space and magic.

I wish to clear a space for creativity without purpose or agenda. May there be space for joy and play.

I wish to clear my resistance to rest and self-care. May there be room for ease and wellness.

I wish to clear my confusion about my own worth — Sakyong Mipham said once “we think we are rocks, but we are gold.” May there be confidence in my basic goodness, may I trust my fundamental wisdom and compassion and strength.

I wish to clear my avoidance of grief. May there be space for sadness, tenderness, and tears.

I wish to clear my discursive thoughts about food. May there be an opening for self-compassion, for sanity, for wholeness and health.

I wish to clear my guilt, sometimes shame around who I am, what I think, feel, do, the way I smash myself to bits. May there be an opportunity for forgiveness, for kindness, for acceptance.

I wish to clear my agenda, my judgement and criticism. May equanimity arise instead.

I wish to clear all the old rules, the perfectionism, the need to be a good girl, the quest to earn love, the pursuit of permission. May I find crazy wisdom, courage and truth in its place.