Category Archives: Dexter

#augustbreak2013 Day Eleven

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Play

viewfromtheballI can’t think about play without thinking of Dexter. He was the most cheerful, happy dog, always looking for an opportunity to have some fun. He is the only dog we’ve had that if we were going on a trip, we needed to make sure and pack toys, and he had favorites: his Little D, various other babies such as his kitty or his baby ram or Monkey, and any tennis ball, even better if he’d found it on a walk.

Dexter on the beach last summer, with a tennis ball he'd found

Dexter on the beach last summer, with a tennis ball he’d found

No matter how much he loved playing with other toys, Little D was always his favorite. It was a bit sad because Little D was the present we gave him for Christmas the month after Obi died, a sort of “sorry your brother is gone” gift. He loved Little D almost as much as he loved his Obi, which is really saying something. One of Dexter’s favorite games with Little D was to throw him into a pile of leaves or snow, bury him deep in the pile, dig him out, shake him around, and then start the whole thing all over again. I’m not sure how much Little D liked it, but Big D loved it.

Without Dexter, play looks a bit different. This morning, it was taking my two boys and my camera up to Lory State Park, going on a three hour hike, being surprised by not one but two mama deers with twin babies, noticing how green everything is and how many wildflowers there are, stopping to smell the vanilla sent of the pines, taking lots of pictures, remembering and missing our Dexter even as we imagined what our next dog might be like, hoping he (she?) has the same playful attitude, cheerful disposition as he did.

#augustbreak2013 Day Eight

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Selfie

selfieI tried taking a new selfie this morning, but every one came out wrong. I looked tired and sad, old, droopy, wrinkly, bloated. Instead of continuing to try, feeling bad about how I looked, being hard on myself, I understood that it was 5 a.m., I am tired and sad, and that does make me look haggard (definition: “looking exhausted and unwell, especially from fatigue, worry, or suffering” — pretty accurate).

So instead I found a self portrait I’d taken earlier in the summer, with Dexter out of frame but happily lounging next to me. I was rested, relaxed, content, at ease, and you can see that in my face. I’m not doing it to deny who I am right now, but rather to remind myself that this is also who I am, still.