1. Morning walks. I can only go a few miles, and this morning was the first time I went somewhere other than around our neighborhood. It was so nice. The tricky part right now is I could probably go on a full length walk, but I can’t be in charge of Ringo yet. He’s pretty good on a leash, but he’s still a dog so sometimes I’m walking one way and he tries to pull me in the opposite direction and with a pretty big incision still healing, that’s not good. I have a follow up appointment with my surgeon on Monday and I’m hoping he’ll clear me to get back in the pool which will help build my strength back up and maybe in another week or two, I can be back to regular morning walks.

2. Rest and recovery. Every single thing I read about healing from this particular surgery said, “when you are tired, rest” and I’ve been doing my best to do that and am feeling a little better every day. I’m so grateful that I have the time and support to be able to just rest and take care of myself. Eric and I were talking this morning as we walked about our upcoming trip to Oregon, where we’ll spend most of the time at the beach. He couldn’t remember if it was two years ago or longer since we last went together, and I told him it was only two years even though it feels like longer because so much has happened since then, and he sighed and said, “yeah, we need a vacation.”

3. Good food. Cooking can be a pain sometimes, mostly because I have a bad habit of waiting until I’m already hungry to consider what to make myself to eat, which makes me hangry and impatient and resort to eating whatever is fast, which is never as good as something I cook. As I’ve had a bit more energy this week, I’ve been trying to cook myself something every day, even if it’s just “fancy” mac and cheese. I finally made the zucchini bread I’d been meaning to for a few weeks and am currently obsessed with honey roasted spicy carrots.

4. Streaming content and portable viewing devices. It’s very nice when you need to rest, to stay “down” but aren’t really up to reading the whole day, that I can take my phone or laptop to the couch or bed and watch a movie or a tv show or listen to a podcast or audiobook.

5. My tiny family, small house, little life. I’m realizing as I stay home more and rest how little I need that is outside this space. Sure, I miss going to the gym and have to go to the grocery store, etc., from time to time, but I’m the most content just staying home with my books and my boys and my bed. And I am not delusional — I recognize how much outside this space has to be in place and functional in order for me to be able to just stay here, and I’m grateful for all that too.

Bonus joy: not responding to the message I got from the person who has my old job asking some question about email FIVE years after I stopped working there (“not my circus, not my monkeys”), crying, all the things I’ve lost because I was lucky enough to have them in the first place, all the things I really wanted and didn’t get because I wouldn’t have landed where I am now, the reminder that “what you engage with you empower” right when I needed it, my mom having a UTI and NOT another stroke (which was the concern when my brother took her to the ER last night), how my mom might not have the best memory right now and gets confused but I can always make her laugh, homemade chicken noodle soup (Knorr Chicken Bouillon is the secret), texting with Chris and Chloe’, sharing reels and memes with Sherri and Kari and Carrie, having a few cups of coffee and realizing I really do like green matcha tea better, surrendering to what is happening instead of resisting it because it’s not what I “wanted,” Susannah Conway’s two new kittens, remembering that a breakdown or a total collapse doesn’t mean the end but rather opens the possibility for something new to emerge (“Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing” ~Arundhati Roy or “Barn’s burnt down — now I can see the moon” ~Mizuta Masahide), my Wild-ish Writing sangha, good books, poetry and poets, comedy, true crime, how much Ringo loves to eat, hugging Eric, sitting with him on the couch, reading in bed at night while Eric and Ringo sleep.