We are so achievement-oriented that we often surge right by the true value of relating to what’s before us, because we think that accomplishing things will complete us, when it is experiencing life that will.

~Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have

1. Truth: I have goals and make plans, and then life happens. I wish I was more accepting of this, met this truth with more grace and flexibility. Instead, I typically initially feel frustration, disappointment, and self-pity. I find myself asking “what if the things I dream of having and doing, the person I hope to be, the effort I’ve put into this ‘project’ that is my life is never realized, never manifests?” The past six years, in particular, have presented obstacle after obstacle, so many detours, so much starting over, beginning again — or at least that’s what it has felt like.

2. Truth: My only real option is to “go with the flow.” Life is going to keep happening. There will always be things I can’t know, understand, or control, causes and conditions that are simply out of my hands. All I can do is meet what arises, what is in this moment, as my whole authentic self. Be self-aware, pay attention with curiosity and without judgment, keep showing up, keep trying, keep my heart open and stay tender, trust myself. And, hopefully, maintain my sense of humor.

3. Truth: They don’t really matter, these little goals and plans of mine. I know that could sound like the bad news but it can also be good, a huge relief. The losses I’ve experienced and the chaos I’ve witnessed in the world have made me realize that accomplishing and striving and having and producing and succeeding (whatever that even means) ultimately have no meaning. In the end, it’s all empty. There is no there, there, and the cake is a lie. All that matters is easing suffering, in myself and in the world, in the ways that I’m able while also forgiving myself for the ways I can’t.

One wish: May we gently put down our agenda and with purpose pass through the portal into the mystery, surrendering to it without resistance or regret.